


Before You Go

by kaitmonster7



Series: Is It My Fault? [2]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Blow Jobs, Choking, F/M, Miscarriage, Oral Sex, Pregnancy, Pregnant Sex, Rough Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-27
Updated: 2020-08-31
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:48:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 12
Words: 37,784
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24409819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaitmonster7/pseuds/kaitmonster7
Summary: This is a sequel series to Is It My Fault? so it's best to read that before reading this. Each chapter will focus on an episode (or series of episodes) of the show that I feel significant to the lives of Aaron and the Reader. While a lot will follow the main plot line of the show, I will diverge occasionally.
Relationships: Aaron Hotchner/Original Female Character(s), Aaron Hotchner/Reader
Series: Is It My Fault? [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1762765
Comments: 33
Kudos: 134





	1. Mayhem/The Angel Maker

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you everyone that took the time to read my first work, Is It My Fault?  
> After telling my own original story, I wanted to see what the lives of Aaron and the Reader would be like as they continued to work together throughout the show.

Hotch, Kate, and I were taking one vehicle, while the others split up along different ones. We knew the terrorists would set off an explosive in order to attract first responders. We’d already informed them all that if a bomb went off, they had to block off the area and wait for us to allow them to enter. 

“Do we have any idea where they may target?” Kate asked, her English accent cutting through the quiet night air.

“None. We just have to wait, build our profile up from there,” Hotch replied. 

I was texting Haley, letting her know we were heading back to the hotel for the night until we got called back. Jack wanted to wait up and say goodnight. 

As we walked up to the SUV, I felt heat and a heard a loud explosive noise. I blinked, suddenly on my back. Groaning, I sat up, my head pounding. I looked around, my vision blurry. 

“Hey lady, hey, are you alright?” A voice asked me, and I looked around. I saw a blurry shape standing above me.

“What happened?”

“That car blew up, are you okay?”

I tried to stand, and fell back onto my ass. My vision finally cleared, and I looked up at the man. He was a younger man, watching me with concern.

He held out a hand to help me stand. I looked around, still confused. I saw Hotch standing next to a store front window. 

“Aaron...?” I called to him, but he didn’t turn around. I stumbled over to him, realizing my leg wasn’t moving the way it normally did. He saw my reflection and turned then.

“Y/n...”

“Where’s Kate?” I asked, and he looked behind me at the SUV that was completely ablaze. He ran then, calling for her. I followed after him, as he looked at the burning hunk of metal. 

I heard a noise to my right, and turned, seeing Kate laying on the ground a few meters away from the wreck.

“Kate!” I limped over to her, falling onto my knees next to her. Aaron came running over. 

“She’s bleeding a lot.” 

“Kate, I gotta lift you okay, I need to put pressure and stop the bleeding,” he lifted her side gently, but she still cried out in pain. 

I looked down the street, seeing a barricade in place with police, fire, and ambulance all waiting behind it. 

“I have an agent down, we need help!” Aaron yelled to them.

“They’re not coming...”Kate whispered, and he looked down at her.

“We told them first responders were the target, they aren’t going to come down here.”

“Okay, get her head, we'll carry her,” Aaron instructed, taking her legs. As he let go of her wound, the bleeding got worse, and Kate groaned in pain.

“Stop, Aaron stop,” I said, putting her down. “We can’t move her.”

“We need help down here!” Aaron yelled again.

“It’s okay...” Kate said. Aaron took his phone out of his jacket, but it had gotten smashed. Mine was completely missing, thrown somewhere when the explosion had occurred. 

I sat down, looking at my limp leg. It didn’t seem broken, which was good. We waited for almost an hour, with Kate bleeding out, before Morgan found us and came running over. Garcia called him, and we discovered the young man who had been helping was the unsub. Morgan ran after him, and we waited again. 

Finally, an ambulance pulled up to us, and the EMT got out. 

“I couldn’t listen to you calling for help anymore. My partner wouldn’t come past the barricade,” the EMT said. He got Kate onto the gurney, and Aaron took the driver’s seat. I sat in the back, trying to help the EMT. We got stopped at the hospital, they tried to reroute us, but the EMT shouted that Kate wasn’t gonna make it. They let us through. 

They took Kate into an OR immediately. Aaron and I got set up in the ER, while they looked us over. My leg was badly bruised, and I had a few cuts and scrapes, but overall I was alright. I had been the furthest away from the explosion. 

Aaron’s eardrum had ruptured, but he would be alright. He wasn’t allowed to fly for at least a week. We’d have to drive back to Virginia. 

The terrorists had been attempted to take out a VIP patient at the hospital. Our hero EMT had been one of them. He slit his own throat before we could take him in. Morgan had almost blown up in the ambulance driving it away from the hospital. Garcia had called me crying, mostly yelling at Morgan, but also crying. Besides me, he was her best friend. 

Kate Joyner had died from her wounds. She and Aaron had a history, one that I didn’t know about it, but he was upset. I knew he blamed himself for her loss, like he blamed himself for my kidnapping. 

The team went back in the jet, while I drove us back down from New York. Aaron was silent in the passenger seat.

“Aaron, there wasn’t anything else we could have done.”

“We gave the wrong profile. If we had got it right, the first responders would have been there to take Kate to the hospital immediately.”

“She may have died anyway.”

“We don’t know that.”

“Exactly. We have no idea what would have happened. You can’t take blame for every bad thing that happens to someone on your team.” He didn’t respond, staring angrily out the windshield. 

“Jack wants you to take him shoe shopping Wednesday. Haley says he keeps growing out of them.” He still remained silent.

“Aaron, if you wanna ignore me as your subordinate that’s fine, but as your girlfriend I will not let you.”

He looked at me, and I gave him a brief glare. “I’m sorry about Kate. She was your friend. But it is not your fault.”

“It could have been you,” he said quietly.

“What?”

“It could have been you. I saw her lying there in the street, and I saw you. What if you had been closer to the SUV? If I had to sit there and hold your blood inside of you, watching you die in front of me.”

“Aaron, I am alive. We knew when we started this that what we did was dangerous.”

“Doesn’t mean I like having constant reminders.”

“You’re the one that got hurt this time, I should be moping and complaining.”

“I’m not complaining.”

“But you admit you’re moping.”

He grabbed my thigh and squeezed it briefly, before leaving his hand there. 

“I’m sorry,” he apologized, “I’m not used to having someone I love be at risk all the time.”

“I know, neither am I. We’re both gonna need to figure it out.”

“Your ear still hurting?” I asked Hotch, as he was trying to subtlety hold it.

“I’m fine.”

“Aaron the Dr said you weren’t supposed to be going into the field yet.”

“He said to stay away from loud noises, I don’t need to avoid the field.”

“Yes, cause you can definitely avoid loud noises in the field.”

“Y/N, it’s fine. I’ll be careful.”

“Hey. You took care of me for like two months. Let me take of you for once, you miserable old man,” I teased, kissing his ear lightly. 

“Gross, Mom and Dad are kissing,” Emily teased, and Reid blushed. 

“Focus, people,” Rossi said, smiling at us. I mouthed a silent ‘thank you’. 

“We’ve got two women, both raped and bludgeoned in their sleep, with post-mortem stab wounds to the stomach,” Rossi informed us as the jet took off. 

“Any DNA left behind by the unsub?” Morgan asked.

“Actually yes. They found semen, the issue is who it belongs to.”

“Who does it belong to?” Reid asked.

“Cortland Bryce Ryan.”

“The Angel Maker?” I asked, sitting up straight. 

“Wasn’t he executed like a year ago?”

“Exactly a year ago,” Hotch pitched in. 

“They don’t really think a dead man is out there committing serial rapes and murders?” Emily asked, incredulous. 

“The police don’t, but the townsfolk do. There was a problem at Ryan’s execution, everyone heard about it. Rumor going around that he survived,” Rossi informed us.

“Who you gonna call?” I pitched in.

“Ghostbusters!” JJ, Morgan, and Prentiss answered at the same time. 

It was the middle of the night, and we were in a graveyard digging up a corpse. 

“This sucks,” I complained, huddling next to Aaron. 

“It’ll suck less once we dig him up. People might actually start talking to us,” Prentiss replied. She motioned for the worker to start pulling the coffin out. The noise was incredibly loud, and I saw  
Aaron grab his ear and groan in pain. 

“Aaron?” He stepped away from the site, moving away and sinking to the ground. I bent down next to him.

“That’s it, we’re leaving, let’s go,” I dragged him up and to the SUV, pushing him into the back seat and climbing up next to him.

“Don’t even give me that ‘I need to be tough in front of the team’ bullshit either. I told you you weren’t ready for the field yet.”

“Y/N…”

“No, I don’t wanna hear it. I am so mad at you.” He leaned over and kissed me, shutting me up. 

“I know, and I love you for being mad at me.”

We ended up outside the latest victims house, and Morgan went in to get her out. Our unsub had nowhere to go. We all waited outside, guns drawn and ready, when she finally came out. She said something, something I couldn't hear, and then raised her gun to shoot us. The cop next to Aaron shot first, right next to his bad ear, and I watched him crumble with the pain. I immediately lowered my weapon and went to him. 

"Aaron? Can you hear me?" He was holding his ear, and I knew it was buzzing loudly. 

"Dammit, Aaron. You are in so much trouble when we get home," I warned him.

When we got back to the hotel, I stripped him slowly, piece by piece. I started with the tie, then his blazer, tossing them both on the chair. I took his holster off, placing it on the dresser. I slowly unbuttoned each button, kissing along his chest as I did. I’d told him it was my night in control. 

I pushed the shirt off his shoulders, and unbuttoned the cuffs so he could slip it off. Running my hands down his bare back, I kissed his neck, making sure to leave a hickey behind. He laughed as he felt what I was doing. 

“Shh…” I grabbed his belt, unbuckling it and pulling it through the loops. “Or I’ll use this to keep you quiet.”

He smirked at me but remained silent, keeping his hands at his sides. Popping the button on his slacks, I unzipped them and pushed them down. I knelt down and pulled off his shoes, chucking them behind me. He stepped out of the pants, and I took his ankle holster off, adding it to the other. Socks were next, and as I stood up I ran my hand across his bulge, feeling it jump at my  
touch. 

“You wanna strip me down?” I asked, and he shook his head. 

“Good boy,” I replied, quickly throwing my shirt off over my head and pushing my pants off. I unhooked my bra and let it drop to the floor. I pushed Aaron to the bed, and he sat down, and as I knelt in from of him I pushed him to lay down on his back. 

I pulled his boxers down just enough to let his cock free. Precum was glistening at the tip, and I licked my lips, immediately putting my mouth on him. He groaned at the heat of my mouth, but remained quiet otherwise. As much as I knew I could deep throat him and finish him quickly, I had other plans, so I sucked on the tip, bopping up and down, using my hand to jerk the rest of his length. When I could feel he was getting close, I stopped, crawling up onto the bed and straddling him. 

“Remember my rules. No touching. No noise. And you cum when I tell you to.” He nodded his agreement, and I positioned his cock at my entrance. I was already soaked, I loved sucking him off. I slid down easily, my body used to his size by now. Didn’t mean I wasn’t stretching as he filled me. I put my hands on his chest, using them as leverage to lift myself up and come down, fucking myself on him. He kept true to the rules, but his eyes watched me the entire time, like he couldn’t wait to have control again. 

I rubbed my clit with one of my thumbs, using my other hand to squeeze my nipple. In a few minutes I reached my peak, pushing him all the way inside me as I moaned, rubbing myself through. I collapsed on his chest, thoroughly satisfied, and knowing he was ready to end this game.

“Do whatever you want,” I panted, and he immediately grabbed me, flipping me onto my back so he was on top and never slipping out of me. He pushed my legs up so my knees reached my chest, pumping into me faster and harder than he’d ever had before. With the new angle he was reaching so deep inside me I thought I would scream. I could feel a second orgasm building, and he knew it. He reached a hand up to my throat and squeezed, just enough to make breathing difficult. 

“You gonna cum again? You use my cock for your pleasure and it wasn’t enough, huh?”

I shook my head, moaning out, “Never enough.”

He kissed me, causing my lack of oxygen to increase slightly before he stopped, keeping his hand on my throat. His thrusts were getting sloppy, and I knew he was almost there. As I felt him release inside me, I came, pushing into the hand on my throat as he pumped into me a few more times, finally stopping and slipping out. He let go of my throat but stayed on top of me, pushing my legs to be flat on the bed so they didn’t cramp. He kissed at my neck where he’d held me, and I knew he’d done it to leave his own mark on me. 

“Fuck, Aaron…”

“You should be mad at me more often,” he laughed, and I gently slapped his back. 

“If I was really mad at you this wouldn’t have happened. I just don’t want you making your ear worse.”

“I know, I’ll stay off the scenes until I get properly cleared.”

I rolled him over and lay on top of him, cuddling up to him. “Thank you.”


	2. Nameless, Faceless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter spans from Nameless, Faceless (season 5 premiere) to Outfoxed (just before episode 100). Aaron and Reader deal with the return of The Reaper and what it means for their family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to have this include episode 100, but I felt like that is such a huge moment for Aaron, and for the Reader, that it needed it's own chapter, so that will be next, and yes it will be angsty and emotional.

“Listen we still have a few hours, I’m gonna go grab Hotch and get him to help us, I’ll be back in 30 mins,” I said, standing up and leaving the doctor’s house. Reid, the doctor, and I were going over his old patient files trying to find someone who matched our profile. So far we had come up with 100 potential names, and we only had a couple hours left before school was out.

I had called Aaron’s cell almost a dozen times. I knew something was wrong. I had spent the night at Garcia’s after having a girls night, and Jack was with Haley. Aaron had never missed that many of my calls before. When I got home, the door was unlocked but shut. I unholstered my gun, holding it in front of me before I went inside, calling to him. I saw the hole in the wall, and panicked. When I got the dining room I saw the blood on the floor and Aaron’s phone on the table. I cleared the apartment, and Aaron wasn’t there. 

I called Garcia, trying to withhold my panic. 

“Hey Penelope, it’s me.”

“Hey girlfriend, long time no talk.”

“Listen, this is important. You can’t tell anyone else on the team. Aaron’s missing.”

“What?”

“He’s not at the apartment, and there’s blood and a gunshot hole in the wall. I need you to send me a team, see what we can find here.”

“You got it, right away,” she said, the worry evident in her voice. I hung up and called Reid, knowing he’d be wondering where I was.

“Spence, Aaron’s missing. I’m looking for him right now, just go through the patient files and see what you can find.”

“Do you need any help?”

“Garcia is sending me a team, just keep working the case and don’t tell the others.” 

Garcia had called to tell me that Aaron was dropped off at the hospital with Morgan’s credentials. I knew what that meant. The Reaper was back.

I ran to the nurses station when I got in.

“I’m looking for Agent Hotchner....er Agent Derek Morgan, whatever name you have him under I need his room.”

“And what’s your relationship with him?”

I held up my badge, “FBI, he’s my coworker.”

She led me to his room, where a doctor was just leaving.

“You here for Agent Hotchner?” She asked, and I nodded.

“Is he okay, can I see him?”

“He’s just waking up now, he was stabbed 9 times, but luckily it missed all his organs.”

“Thank you,” I said before going into the room. It hadn’t been luck, Foyet wasn’t ready to kill him yet.

Aaron was drowsy, but he looked at me as I entered.

“If you had died on me I would have killed you,” I told him, walking over and taking his hand, kissing it gently. I wanted to cry and curl up in his arms, but I knew it wasn't the time.

“I know you would,” he said. “It was The Reaper.”

“I know.”

“What did he take?”

“I’m not sure yet, the apartments being catalogued right now.”

“What did he leave?”

“Morgan’s credentials, they thought you were him for a while.”

“That’s not personal enough...he left that to let them know I was FBI. Where are my clothes?” 

I grabbed the bag of his stuff and handed it to him. He pulled his bloody shirt out, and I cringed at the sight. He grabbed Morgan’s credentials, and opened them. A picture of Haley and Jack was inside, with a bloody thumb print on it.

I grabbed my phone and called Morgan, told him to go to Haley’s house and make sure she and Jack were safe and to bring them to the hospital. 

“Aaron, nothing is going to happen to them. I won’t let it.” He nodded, but I could see how worried he was.

About 30 minutes later Morgan called me back, telling me he had found Haley at the house and grabbed Jack from school. They were on their way. We made Morgan keep Jack occupied while   
Haley came into the room.

“Aaron, Y/N, what the hell is going on?”

“Aaron was attacked by a serial killer. The Reaper. He escaped police custody a few months back, now he’s after Aaron,” I informed her. 

“Are you gonna be okay?” Haley asked him, and he nodded.

“Haley, you and Jack need to go into witness protection,” he told her, and she shook her head.

“Aaron, I have a life now. I can’t just drop everything and go.”

“Haley, The Reaper specifically told us he is targeting you and Jack next. If he finds you before we find him, he will kill you, just to punish Aaron,” I told her. 

“For how long?”

“Until we find him.”

Haley nodded, clearly upset but understanding that it was best for Jack. 

“We’ve got a US Marshall that will be the only person who knows where you are. He’ll keep you safe until we find Foyet,” I told her, rubbing her shoulder gently. 

“What about you?” She asked me.

“Foyet doesn’t know about me, other than I work with Aaron. We’re gonna keep it that way.”

“Is Jack here?” Aaron asked, and Haley nodded. “Can I see him?”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea…”

“Haley, please.”

“Ok,” she nodded, and left to get Jack. Jack came running into the room, and I lifted him onto the bed gently to sit next to Aaron.

“Hi daddy.”

“Hey buddy, how was school?” 

We chatted with Jack and Haley for a little while, until US Marshal Kassmeyer came to get them ready to move. 

Aaron walked into the apartment, and I closed and locked the door behind us. I had an alarm system installed while he was in the hospital, his demand. The carpet had been professionally cleaned, twice. I had them do the whole apartment. The thought of Foyet in my house made me want to be sick, especially knowing what he did to Aaron. 

Aaron was looking at the calendar we kept on the fridge, mostly so we’d remember stuff for Jack. 

“It’s the 19th today?” He asked, and I nodded. 

“Yup, why?”

“It’s our anniversary.”

“Is it?” I walked over and looked at the calendar as well. Jack had circled the date and wrote our names in it, spelled mostly wrong, but we knew what he meant. 

“I didn’t even realize...” I said, putting my purse on the table. 

Aaron walked over to me and turned me to face him, kissing me deeply.

“Mmm what was that for?” I asked, smiling up at him.

“For making us forget.”

“You did not, it’s not your fault. It’s fine, we’ll celebrate this weekend.”

“2 years...why did we choose today?” He asked, pretending not to remember what 2 years ago was.

I blushed, knowing he wanted me to say it. “You know why...”

“Don’t think I do...”

I put my hands on his back, slowly lowering them to grab his ass. “It’s the day in Atlanta...when you came to my room...Our first date.”

“What did we do that night?”

I squinted my eyes. “You gave me one of the best orgasms of my life.”

“Right, I remember that now. Perhaps we should recreate it?” I could feel his cock hardening against my thigh.

“Dr hasn’t cleared you for sex yet,” I told him. 

“I believe that first night was all about you. I think I can still eat your cunt without hurting myself.” 

“If you think I’m not sucking your dick tonight, you have another thing coming.”

“Is that so?”

I leaned up and kissed his neck, before putting my lips to his ear. “Yes, sir.”

He pushed me back towards the bedroom, and I laughed as he backed me onto the bed. 

“Get your pants off,” he ordered, and I immediately pushed them down and kicked them off my feet. I was wearing a thong, and Aaron pushed it to the side, giving him access to my aching pussy.   
He pulled me to the end of the bed, so my legs hung off, and knelt on the ground in front of me before nipping at my inner thigh. 

“I’ll never get enough of you,” he vowed, shoving two fingers into me alongside his tongue. 

“Don’t ever,” I moaned. He worked in another finger and moved up to my clit, running his tongue flat across it and making my hips jump. It had been a while since we’d had sex, and I could feel myself reaching my peak quickly. When I felt him brush a fourth finger near my entrance I lost it, moaning loudly as he pumped his fingers into me, cleaning me with his tongue while he did. 

“Fuck, you’re too good at that,” I complimented, and he laughed. “k, get up here.” 

He stood up and crawled onto the bed, laying down on his side with his head on the pillow. He put his hands behind his head, relaxing. 

I shook my head. “You won’t be so relaxed in a minute, Agent Hotchner.” I undid his pants and pulled them down along with his boxers, just to his thighs so I could get my mouth around his cock. I took his entire length in my mouth, making sure to swallow once I reached the root and causing him to groan loudly. 

“Jesus Y/N.”

I bat my eyelashes at him, using my tongue on the underside as I came back up, sucking the tip. His hands went to my hair, gripping it with just enough force to make me clench. I used every trick I knew to get him to cum quickly, and it didn’t take long. He held me on his cock as he released into my mouth, and I swallowed, loving the taste of him. When he was done he let go of my hair, and I pulled off, moving down to lick at his balls. 

“Do not start, or I will ignore the Dr’s orders and fuck you into the mattress.” I fake grumbled, moving up to lay beside him. 

“Happy anniversary, baby.”

“Happy anniversary.”

As we were lying in bed the next morning, Aaron turned to look at me.

“Foyet offered me the same deal he offered Detective Shaunessy, I didn’t take it.”

“None of us would have taken that deal.”

“I said no and he shot up that bus. He found our address, he’s threatening Haley and Jack. If I had taken the deal none of that would have happened.”

“And you’d be looking over your shoulder forever, knowing he was out there waiting for you to die. You don’t know what would happen after that.”

“I will find him, y/n. I won’t let him hurt our family,” Aaron promised.

I kissed him lightly. “I know you will.”

Aaron stepped down as unit chief in order to keep the team together. He pushed Morgan into his position, and spent long hours teaching Derek how the job works. When he wasn’t training Morgan, he was researching Foyet. I’d usually find him passed out at the table, head on a pile of paperwork. 

Jack and Haley were still in protective custody, though they had to be moved when Haley called her mother. 

I spent most of my evenings alone, letting Aaron work, or out with Reid or Garcia. They kept me company. 

I knew Strauss was coming down on him, and I couldn’t defend him without getting called out that our relationship impaired my perspective. 

Strauss found me at my desk one day, looking as serious as she always did.

“Agent y/l/n.”

“Ma’am.”

“Come with me,” she ordered, and walked to an empty office. Reid gave me a look, and I rolled my eyes in response before getting up to follow her.

“Close the door.”

I did as instructed and looked at her.

“What’s this about, ma’am?”

“Agent Hotchner and George Foyet.”

“Yeah I figured.”

“Your relationship with Agent Hotchner isn’t a secret, but you’ve remained professional at work and in the field. The rest of your team are loyal to him, I respect that. As are you, but you see him   
more often than the others, you see a side of him the rest of us never do. How is he doing, really?”

“Permission to speak freely?”

She nodded.

“Is this actually about how Hotch is doing, or do you want to know if he’s fit to do his job?”

“He’s obsessed with Foyet, that takes up all his mental facilities. We don’t need him slipping up on a case.”

“Foyet’s threatening his ex and his son. We can’t see them again until he’s caught. Foyet also stabbed Hotch 9 times in our apartment just for the fun of it. He’s not obsessed, he’s determined. And that determination transfers to any active case we have.”

“So you would be willing to take any blame if Agent Hotchner screws up?” Strauss asked me.

“If that’s what it takes to get the director off our backs, ma’am.”

“Fine. I’ll leave it up to you to decide if and when Agent Hotchner needs to be removed from the field,” she said, dismissing me.

I stormed back to my desk, knowing that I couldn’t throw a fit in the office. 

“Wanna go get lunch?” Spencer asked, and I nodded. 

“Get me away from that woman,” I complained and he laughed. He took my arm and we went to lunch.

“So how’s Hotch doing, really?” Spence asked, and I sighed. 

“I dunno, he’s stressed, probably to the max. We barely spend any time together anymore.”

“No luck figuring out where Foyet is?” 

I shook my head. “Aaron could probably write a biography of him by now, but still no idea where to even look for him. As long as he doesn’t know where Haley and Jack are that’s all that really matters.”

“What did Strauss want?” He asked, taking a bite of his sandwich. 

“For me to snitch on Aaron. I wouldn’t, obviously, so now I’m in shit if he explodes in the field. Which he won’t.” 

“Yeah if anyone has control over his emotions, it’s Hotch. Do you think he blinked when Foyet was stabbing him?”

“I dunno…probably not. Is that like an alpha male thing?”

“Yeah, people who don’t blink often are seen as stronger. Foyet hardly blinked, I bet Hotch didn’t either to show dominance.”

“I’ve never really asked him about that night.”

“Yeah…it’s not something you ever really wanna relive.” I knew Spencer was thinking back to when Tobias Hankel had kidnapped and tortured him. I kissed my fingers and put them to his lips, something I had picked up from Garcia. 

“I wish we’d been better friends back then, Spence. I could have helped you more.”

“Oh, don’t y/n. I don’t really think anyone could have helped me. I’m just glad we’re friends now.”

“You know I love you right?” 

Spencer nodded. I knew he didn’t hear it enough, from anyone. “I love you, too,” he mumbled. 

When I got home that night, Aaron was working at the dining table. He barely looked up when I entered, and I sighed. After the meeting with Strauss, and lunch with Spencer, I was emotionally exhausted and really needed my boyfriend. I walked over, and pushed his shoulders so he sat back in his chair. 

“Y/N what are you doing?” he asked. I threw my leg over his and straddled his lap. 

“I understand how hard you’re working to find Foyet. But you need a break. We need a break,” I said, kissing him gently. 

His brows furrowed as he looked at me. 

“I’ve been neglecting you haven’t I?”

I nodded. “Yeah, but I understand. I’m just worried you’re gonna work yourself to exhaustion and you’re not gonna be ready when you need to be.”

“You’re right. I’m not getting anywhere, especially not tonight.” He gripped my hips, holding me to him as he stood up, and I wrapped my legs around his waist. 

He began to walk towards the bedroom, but I dug my nails into his shoulder.

“No, right here.”

“You want me to fuck you on the dining table?”

“Yup.”

He smirked and put me down on the table, pushing my legs open to stand in between. He grabbed my shirt and pulled it off over my head, leaving me in my bra. I reached behind me and unhooked it, letting it slide down my arms. He took it and chucked it into the hall. Aaron leaned down and pulled one of my nipples into his mouth, sucking on it while he pulled at my pants. 

Once they were off he shoved my thong aside and pushed two fingers inside me. He prepped me, making sure I was wet enough. 

“Get down and turn around,” he ordered, stepping away and undoing his pants. 

“Take it all off,” I countered, hopping off the table and turning, laying my chest down and putting my ass up. I looked back to see him taking off his shirt and stepping out of his pants. He shoved three fingers back into me, stretching me, and I moaned, pushing into them. Then he moved closer, lining up with my entrance. He removed his fingers and immediately replaced them with his cock. I let out a satisfied moan, having missed the feeling of him inside me. 

Aaron set a brutal pace, grabbing my hips to pull me back and meet his thrusts. I reached out and grabbed the table, holding myself in place so I didn’t slide forward. I felt a hand slap my ass, and clenched my walls around him. That just urged him on, and he slapped me again. Then he reached that hand around to rub my clit, working me to orgasm quickly. When I came my walls squeezed him, but he kept going, pounding me through it and continuing his abuse of my clit. 

“Fuck Aaron…”

He leaned down and kissed my back, focusing his thrusts to be harder and more direct against my g-spot. I was moaning like a professional whore, and I loved it. He grabbed my ass with both hands, lifting me slightly, deepening his thrusts until I came again. This time, he gave a few more short pumps before settling inside and releasing. We were both panting from exertion, and he pulled out, grabbing a dish towel and wetting it. He cleaned himself quickly, before rubbing the towel along my leaking pussy. 

“Ugh…stop that,” I said, overly sensitive. He just chuckled and tossed the towel into our mess of clothes that were bound for the wash. He pulled me up and grabbed me bridal style, carrying me to the bedroom. 

“As much as I enjoyed our comeback performance, let’s not go this long again,” I complained, and he nodded, kissing me deeply. 

“Yes ma’am.”


	3. 100

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader and Aaron deal with a huge familial loss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one is a bit short guys, but I decided to focus on Aaron and Reader, rather than others.

Sam Kassmeyer was alive, barely, but there was no sign of Foyet.

“Sam, where’s Foyet?” Aaron asked him as we waited for the medical team to arrive. 

“I didn’t tell him anything…”

“It’s okay Sam, you did good. Just tell me where he is.”

“I didn’t tell him…where she is…”

“I know.”

“didn’t need me to…” Aaron was confused, as was I, until I looked over where Sam’s eyes were looking.

“Aaron…his phone,” I got up and grabbed it, looking at the recent calls list.

“She’s going to him…” Sam said. 

“Foyet called Haley,” I confirmed, hitting the redial button. 

“He would have made her ditch the phone,” Aaron said, and I could tell he was barely holding it together. Aaron rode with Sam in the ambulance, while I followed them in the car. Sam didn’t make it. Aaron’s face was determined, and he made me switch seats with him. 

“He’ll take her home,” Aaron said, and I nodded. The one place it would hurt Aaron the most. 

We were on our way to Aaron and Haley’s old house when his cell rang. We both looked at it, knowing who it must be. He answered it and put it on speakerphone. 

“Foyet?” He asked.

“Aaron? You’re alive? But he said...oh,” Haley answered. 

“Haley, it’s gonna be okay.”

“Is y/n there too?”

“I’m here, Haley,” I responded. 

“Where’s Jack?” he asked her.

“He’s here.”

“Tell Jack I need him working the case,” Aaron instructed her, and we heard her telling Jack. He wanted Jack out of the room. 

“Aaron I’m so sorry.”

“No, Haley, it’s not your fault. You’re so strong, stronger than I ever was. I know you didn’t sign up for this.”

“Neither did you. Promise me you’ll tell Jack how we met. Tell him how you used to make me laugh.”

“Haley…”

“He’s needs to know you weren’t always so serious, Aaron.”

“I will,” Aaron was crying, trying desperately to hold it together as we drove to their house.

“Y/n?” She asked, and I swallowed, trying to clear my throat from the tears.

“Yeah?”

“You take care of my boys for me, okay.”

“I will.”

“Aaron I-“ but she was cut off by a gunshot, and then a second one. I put my face in my hands, sobbing.

Aaron hung up the phone, throwing it at the dashboard.

When we got the house, the gate was open. I pulled myself together, getting out and drawing my gun. I went in the front, Aaron went around back. It was dark in the house, and I didn’t turn on   
any lights, moving carefully. I saw a flashlight beam from the kitchen, knowing it was Aaron. I moved silently from room to room until I met up with Aaron by the stairs. There was blood on the steps leading up. Aaron led the way, and I followed. We cleared the rooms, then followed the blood to the main bedroom.

As we walked in, we saw feet sticking out behind the bed. Aaron avoided looking, clearing the room, but I looked down. I had to bite my lip to stop myself from crying out. I bent down, checking for a pulse I knew wasn’t there. Haley wasn’t posed in a way I knew Foyet would want, which meant he wasn’t finished. 

I was about to say something when Aaron walked slowly over to the curtains. Everything happened so quickly after that. Aaron shot at the curtains, and Foyet fell to the floor. When Aaron flipped him over, we saw he had a bullet proof vest on. He hit Aaron, and began to run. Aaron shot him again, this time hitting him, and he tripped in the hall. Aaron ran after him and they fell down the stairs. Foyet punched him, trying to escape again. I saw Aaron tackle him into the dining room. I ran down after him, and found Aaron beating Foyet to death.

The team showed up then, kicking in the front door. Morgan pulled Aaron off, telling him Foyet was dead. Prentiss took my arm and pulled me out of the room. She was asking me something but I couldn’t hear her. I watched Aaron go upstairs to the master bedroom, and I went up after him. The pain he released in his cries, holding Haley’s body to him were too much for me. I went to his office, knowing that Jack was there, hiding. I pulled open the ottoman to see him looking up at me.

“I worked the case, y/n.”

“I know, buddy. Good job,” I said, helping him out of the seat. I hugged him tightly, keeping my emotions in check. Aaron had told me he once found Jack hiding in the ottoman while he was working because he wanted to help solve the case. 

“Is the bad man gone?”

“Yeah...daddy got rid of him.”

Aaron came in a minute later, hugging Jack just as tightly. 

We had to be processed, and EMTs looked at Aaron, but we were allowed to go home. Aaron had to explain to Jack that his mother was gone, though at 4 he didn’t really understand.   
Aaron put Jack to bed, while I sat on the couch. I didn’t know what to say, or what to do. How do you comfort your boyfriend on the death of his ex-wife, the mother of his child, at the hands of a vicious serial killer that had been stalking him? How do you comfort him when you know he blames himself for not taking the stupid deal?

Aaron came out of Jacks room, and leaned against the dining table. I watched him, waiting for him to let me know what he needed. 

We didn’t speak for minutes on end, til he finally came over and sat next to me on the couch. I took his hand, holding it in mine. Letting him know I was there. 

“I don’t know what to do...” he said finally.

“You don’t have to do anything, other than be here for Jack, and for yourself.”

“I don’t know if I could hold myself together without you here,” he said, taking our entwined hands, lifting them and kissing the back of mine.

“I’ll be here for whatever you need.”

Aaron was put on indefinite leave, to spend time with Jack, arrange Haley’s funeral, and get Jack moved into the apartment with us. They wouldn’t offer me the same luxury, so I was officially on duty if a case came up. 

The day of Haley’s funeral was hard. Aaron was a pallbearer, and I walked behind holding Jack’s hand with Haley’s sister, Jessica. Once we got to the reception, it was a blur of faces I didn’t know, telling me how sorry they were, and I wanted to scream that it wasn’t me that needed comfort. Haley and I had grown to be friends, working on co-parenting Jack together in a way that worked for all of us. I spent most of my nights trying not to hear the sound of her voice as Foyet shot her. 

I saw Dave come over to Aaron and I, and I focused my attention back to the real world. 

“I think maybe you guys could use a break,” he said, and Aaron nodded, taking my hand in his as Dave led us out onto the balcony. 

“Jessica can you make sure Jack gets something to eat?” Aaron asked as we passed her, and she nodded. Out in the fresh air we could let our guard down. Dave was Aaron’s best friend, and had been a great friend to me since he came back to the BAU. We had nothing to hide from him. 

I leaned down against the railing, letting a few tears slip out. Aaron and Dave were talking, he was asking how Aaron was holding up, how Jack was. I didn’t need to contribute. After a few minutes Morgan came outside.

“Sorry to interrupt, but we’ve got a case.”

I looked up then, giving him an incredulous look. “Tonight? We have a case tonight?”

“I’m sorry, y/n,” he said, going back inside. I looked through the window to see the rest of the team getting up, waving to Aaron through the glass. 

“I’ll meet you at the car,” Dave said to me, and I nodded. He gave Aaron a kiss on either cheek before he left. 

“I’m not going,” I said to Aaron.

“Y/N-“

“No. Jesus Christ, we just buried Haley and they want me to go work a case?”

Aaron came over and wrapped his arms around me, hugging me to him.

“It’s okay. Haley would understand. Go save lives.”

I pulled away and kissed him gently. “I love you.”

“Ditto,” he said with a sad smile. We went inside together, and I bent down in front of Jack, who was eating a sandwich.

“Hey buddy, I gotta go to work and catch some bad people, okay? I’ll call you in the morning.” Jack nodded, and I kissed his head, before giving Aaron a final kiss and going to meet Dave at his car. 

He was waiting to open my door for me, always the perfect gentleman. 

“I fucking hate this, Dave.”

“I know you do, bella.” He closed the door behind me and went around to his side of the car, driving us to the office so we could get briefed on the new case. 

Aaron and I were having our usual evening catch up, this time unfortunately over the phone. 

“Jack fell asleep early tonight,” he told me. 

“Aw, but who’s gonna wish me good dreams?”

“I’ll have to do,” he said, and I could hear the smile in his voice. “Y/N, I saw Strauss today.”

I sat up straighter in bed. “And?”

“She offered me retirement. Full pension and benefits.”

“Wow…”

We both stayed silent for a minute.

“Are you going to take it?” I asked.

“I don’t know.”

“You’d be able to spend more time with Jack.”

“I know.”

“But you love this job,” I said finally, knowing what his answer was eventually going to be.

“Haley and I divorced because of this job. She died because of it. It would be an insult to her to leave now.”

“Baby, Haley knew how important this was to you. But Jack is more important, how are we going to work our jobs around him?”

“Jessica offered to watch Jack when we’re away. Actually, she demanded to watch Jack and basically told me to go back to work.”

“Good old Jess, those Brooks girls have a lot of spirit,” I said, laughing slightly. “So you’re coming back then.”

“Yes, once you guys are done this case.”

“I love you, give Jack twenty million kisses for me when he gets up in the morning.”

“Absolutely not, ten million and no more.”

“You drive a hard bargain, Hotchner.”

“I love you, Y/N.” He hung up and I went to sleep, knowing we had a lot to figure out in our lives now that we were full-time parents. 

“Aaron, I have nothing to wear to a fundraising gala,” I complained. “Why do we even have to go?”

“I’m the unit chief of the BAU, and you’re my girlfriend. And you do have something to wear.”

“Pretty positive I don’t.”

He came out of the bedroom holding up a red dress, the red dress I was meant to wear to our friend’s wedding before Tuck kidnapped and tortured me. 

“Aaron, I can’t wear that.”

“Yes, you can.”

“No. Look at it, it’s got spaghetti straps and a low cut back.” I mostly wore long sleeves and pants in order to hide the scars all over my body. I couldn’t hide all of them, the ones on my neck   
always showed but they were small.

“Y/N, you are beautiful. You’re going to wear this dress, and show everyone at the FBI gala what it means to be strong.”

I sighed and took the dress from him. “Let me try it on and decide.” I went into the bedroom and changed, slipping the straps over my shoulders. I looked at myself in the mirror. As faint as most of the visible scars were, I could notice them. My brain told me I saw them because I knew they were there, because I hated them. No one would even notice unless they were close to me.

I stepped out into the hall, and Aaron was waiting for me.

“You look so beautiful,” he said, coming over and kissing me. He began sliding the straps down my arm, but I stopped him.

“Jack’s asleep right there,” I whispered, and he nodded.

“I know. Guess you’ll have to be really quiet,” he said, backing me into the bedroom and closing the door behind us.


	4. Valhalla

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader deals with the loss of a teammate, and we see more into her friendship with Spencer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter in pieces, from the moment I watched 'Lauren' last week, and I'm finally happy with how it is. It spans a much wider section of the show, from Lauren to Proof, which in the show is about 7 months.

Morgan and I ran to Emily. She was on the floor, with a wooden stake in her stomach.

“Prentiss, it’s Morgan. Stay with me.”

“Morgan…?” She could barely keep her eyes open.

“I’m here. I need a medic!”

“Emily, it’s gonna be okay,” I said, taking her hand, while Morgan took her other. 

“Just let me go…”

“No!”

“Baby, you stay with me, hey look at me, squeeze my hand if you can still hear me,” Morgan ordered her. She squeezed both.

“Emily please hold on,” I begged her.

“I know why you did it, what you did for Declan. You are so brave, I am so proud of you,” Morgan told her. I could only focus on stopping myself from crying. I held her hand like it was the only thing keeping her tied to me. Cause it was.

In the visitors lounge we all waited. Aaron held my hand, and as he squeezed I could feel Emily, feel how she lost her hold, how her fingers went limp. We waited. And waited.

I could hear heels clicking on the floor, and we all sat up straight, staring at the doorway. JJ walked in, and we all knew from her face. 

“No…” Penelope said softly.

“She didn’t make it off the table,” JJ told us. I closed my eyes, feeling the tears fall down my cheeks. We’d been too late. Reid stood up and began to storm off, but JJ stopped him.

“Reid.”

“I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye,” he confessed, and JJ hugged him. Aaron let go of my hand, walking into the other room. Morgan was comforting Penelope. I just watched as JJ went through the door and spoke with Aaron, before he came back and sat next to me. Eventually we all had to make the decision to go home. There wasn’t anything else we could do for our friend. 

We didn’t speak the whole ride home, or when we got into the apartment. Aaron had called Jessica and asked her to keep Jack for the night. I sank into the dining room chair, and began to sob.

Aaron came and knelt in front of me, taking my hands in his and kissing them, before leaning his head in my lap. 

“She wanted to protect us…and she died for it,” I sobbed.

“I know, baby, I know,” he said. I don’t know how long we sat there. Until long after my tears ran dry, until Aaron’s knees hurt too much, and he stood, pulling me up with him and taking me to bed. He took off my clothes, unhooking my bra and tossing it into the hamper. He took off his suit, throwing the tie to land wherever it chose. Then he laid me on the bed and held me until I fell asleep. 

The next day came in waves. I remembered waking up, but not eating breakfast, or going into the office. We weren’t expected to work, but we all knew that’s where we needed to be. I remember hugging Penelope, but not the coffee in my hand, or that I had ended up sitting at Emily’s desk. None of us knew what to do without her. We were a team, a family, and we’d just lost a limb. It would take time to relearn our lives without her. 

“She had a cat…” Spencer said suddenly, snapping me back to the present. 

“She did?” 

“Yeah, Sergio. Where is he?”

“She left us a note, he’s with the cat sitter,” Morgan said. 

“I’ll take him,” Penelope pitched in. “He should be with family.”

“Hotch tell Jack?” Morgan asked, and I shook my head. 

“Not yet. We wanted to wait…until…I don’t know.” I wiped at my cheeks, brushing away the tears that seemed to constantly be falling. I couldn’t even tell anymore. This was worse than thinking I was going to die. Emily was really gone. 

“They’re planning to have the funeral on Saturday,” Morgan told us. 

“They’re gonna keep us off cases until then?” Reid asked, resentment in his voice. I reached around the partition between his desk and Emily’s and took his hand. 

“They have to. They know none of us are going anywhere until we say goodbye,” Morgan replied. 

Aaron was picking up Jack. I felt his absence deeply. After 3 years together, I relied on him completely. He held me together when I fell apart, and I could feel my walls crumbling bit by bit. 

The doors of the bullpen pushed open, and Jack came running in. I stood up, crouching to his height and quickly hugged him, lifting him in my arms. I held his head to my shoulder, finding comfort in the sound of his heartbeat. 

Aaron came in behind him, and I saw a twinge of a smile on his lips at the sight of us. Having Jack had become so much more precious to me, knowing how quickly I could lose it all. I put him down when he started wiggling, and he was getting heavy. 

“Where’s Aunt Emily?” he asked, and I bit my lip. 

“Aunt Emily…she’s with your mom. A very bad man took her from us.”

“Is that why you’re crying?” he asked, touching my face lightly. 

“Yeah buddy. I really miss her,” I leaned in and kissed his forehead. “Let’s go home.” I took his hand and walked over to Aaron. He took Jack’s other hand and we left, waiting for the elevator. 

The funeral was hard. I knew it would be. We all carried her casket to the grave site. Aaron held me to his side while the pastor read out his sermon, and told us all of Emily’s many amazing feats. 

None of it mattered. The only thing we cared about was she was gone, and she did it to save us. 

JJ had to go back to the Pentagon. It felt like losing her all over again. But it didn’t hurt as much, knowing there were worse ways to lose her. Our first case after Emily involved a young man who we profiled as paranoid schizophrenic, but Reid figured out he was also suffering from insomnia. I knew this case was rough for him, I cornered him in the men’s room. 

“Y/N, this is the men’s room,” Spence informed me, and I nodded.

“I’m aware.” I locked the door, and turned to face him. “Spence…you’re not okay, and I’m not letting you out of here until you tell me what’s going on with you lately.”

“I’m having these awful headaches…I can’t sleep…”

“You went to a Dr already?”

“I went to a bunch of them, they can’t find anything wrong with me.”

“So you think it might be schizophrenia?” I asked, walking over to where he stood at the sinks. 

“No, but I’m worried it might be. Predicting the likelihood of developing a genetic disorder is almost improbable.”

“Spence…you know even if you did…you wouldn’t be like him. You know more than any of us the different types of schizophrenia,” I took his hand, and I could feel it shaking slightly.

“I know…but the longer this goes on, the more worried I get.”

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

“I don’t know…I was afraid.” I hugged him, pulling his head down so I could reach and kiss him. 

“Baby boy, you come to me with anything and everything from now on. I need you, and you need someone too.”

He nodded. “After Tuck had you, the first time, when you found out who he was…how did you feel?” 

“Terrified. Confused. Lost.”

“You didn’t tell me about it.”

“I know. Now we’ve both realized how stupid we were. No more secrets, promise?” I asked, holding up my pinky finger. He wrapped his around mine.

“Promise.”

Aaron sat in a chair he had pulled up, and I was sitting on the couch. 

“We’re doing an official assessment?” I asked, and he nodded. 

“It’s routine after a loss. Strauss wanted to send in someone else, but I asked to do them. It’s our family, it should be between us.”

“So you wanna know how I’m feeling about losing Emily?”

“Your official comments, I already know how you feel, Y/N,” he said softly. 

I sniffled, feeling tears welling in my eyes. It still hurt to think about her. 

“So, five stages of grief sort of thing. Can’t really deny she’s gone, and I can’t feel angry because this is our job, we risk our lives every day. So…bargaining…nothing I ask for, nothing I offer will bring her back…so I guess I’m at depression.”

“Why do you think you’re stuck here?”

“Because she walked out of our office knowing she may not see us again, and she did it to keep us safe. She knew Doyle wanted her dead, she knew her chances of taking him down, and she went after him anyway. I can’t…reconcile that yet…”

“How have you been feeling at work?”

I sighed, looking at him. “Aaron…you know how I feel, how I am. Probably a lot better than I do.”

“I know you’re stressed, that something else is bothering you, and adding that to losing Prentiss, your mind isn’t focused.”

“No…I suppose it’s not.”

“Do you need time off?” He asked seriously. 

“No.”

“Y/N…”

“No. I’m fine…I’ll be fine. I’m sorting it out.”

“What aren’t you telling me?”

“It doesn’t matter, it’s fine.”

“Are you keeping it from me as your boss, or as your partner?”

“Both.”

“Fine, we’re done for today,” he said, standing and going to his desk. 

“Aaron…just give me some time to figure it out, okay?” I pleaded with him. 

He nodded, but I could tell he was hurt and confused. I didn’t know what else to say to him, so I left. I looked at my watch, and headed out to the elevator. 

“Hey pretty girl, where you off to?” Morgan called after me.

“I got an appointment, I’ll be back later.”

“Okay,” he said, going back to his coffee hunt. He was carrying his mug to the break room. I just needed to be alone. I went to visit Emily, to tell her how lost we all were without her, how scared I was for Spencer, how scared I knew he was. She was always the one that you could talk to without judgement. 

Our next case involved a grieving mother on a shooting spree. Aaron went in to talk her down. He succeeded, and we got to go home. I made sure Jessica kept Jack awake for us. I needed to hold him. He fell asleep in my arms, and I tucked him into his bed, making sure to turn his nightlight on and leave the door open a crack. 

“How are you feeling?” Aaron asked me when I came back out to the living room. 

“I understand Shelley’s grief…she watched her son die and no one helped.”

“There wasn’t anything you could do for Emily.”

“I know, but it doesn’t change anything. Then I thought of losing Jack, and…I just don’t know if I can do this job anymore,” I said honestly, sitting next to him. 

“It’ll take time to heal. We’re gonna have cases like this, that hit us where it hurts the most, it’s okay to be wounded by them.” I moved to sit in his lap, curling my head into his neck. 

“Should take your own advice you know. It’s been just over a year since we lost Haley. I know you’re trying to be strong for us, for the team, but you can be wounded too.”

He kissed the top of my head. “You and Jack make me strong.”

“Remember the other day, when I said I needed time to figure stuff out?”

“Of course.”

“I think I’m ready.” He waited patiently for me to get my thoughts together.

“Losing Haley…and then Emily, and everything that went on with Tuck, I was scared. Because I realized how much I needed you, and how quickly it could all go away.”

Aaron kissed my head, listening. 

“We’ve been together so long, but we’ve never talked about anything beyond this. I’m just worried that something’s gonna happen, and it’ll just be over.”

“I’m not going anywhere, Y/N. Neither are you. I wanna show you something,” he said, moving me off of him and getting up. He went to his office, and came back, holding something in his hand. He sat down next to me again and offered it to me. 

It was a ring box, and when I opened it the most beautiful ring I’d ever seen was inside. 

“I’ve had that for the last 2 years. I’ve been ready to marry you for a long time. So you can take all the time you need, and let me know when you’re ready.”

I straddled him, kissing him deeply, my hands going behind his head. I had dropped the ring on the couch next to us. 

“I love you so much, Aaron Hotchner,” I whispered against his lips.

“Ditto.”

Jack was still learning how to move around the ball, tripping over himself more often than not. He took a good tumble during one game, and Aaron quickly jogged over, picking him up and brushing off his knees. Jack went right back to playing, he was tough the way kids are, and Aaron came back over to me. 

“They want me to start coaching,” he said, as I was clapping and cheering Jack on.

“Really? Baby, when the hell are you gonna have time to coach?”

“Well we’re already at his games, and I mean…none of the other parents are very involved.”

I looked around. Most of the adults had their faces in their phones. 

“Fair point. You know Dave likes soccer…”

Aaron smiled and gave me a quick kiss. “I’ll be sure to mention you told me.”

“Oh don’t do that, I just got back on his good side.”

“Where’s Hotch?” Garcia asked as she came in, looking specifically at me.

“He’ll be here in a minute.”

“Has he ever called a meeting this early before?” Seaver asked.

“Once, 3 years ago,” Reid answered.

“What for?”

“Gideon had left.”

“Who’s leaving?!” Garcia asked, panicked.

“No one is leaving,” Rossi answered.

Aaron came in then and sat down. “Thank you all for coming in so early. The Director called a meeting last night about budget cuts. Every department is being looked at, and we’re no exception. They’re putting out the offer of leaving the team. I don’t want this team breaking up any more than I believe you all do, but the option stands. You’ll be getting offers, Morgan they’ve renewed interest in you for the New York office.”

“No one’s called me,” Morgan responded.

“They will. All I ask is if you receive an offer from another department, whether you take it or not, just let me know.”

“Are you staying?” Seaver asked.

“Right now that’s my plan.”

“You’re going to Pakistan?!” I yelled the moment we got into the apartment.

“Y/N…”

“No, do not interrupt me. You’re going to Pakistan?! On an intelligence mission?! And you didn’t think to discuss this with me first?”

“It’s an investigative task force, and I already knew what you what say.”

“Oh you did? Wow. Because you’ve been profiling me? Fuck you, Aaron.”

“Y/N it will only be for a couple months.”

“A couple months. In Pakistan. Without me.”

“Yes.”

“And I’m just gonna sit here and play the doting step-mother while you’re gone?!” 

“No, you’re going to be working with the team. JJ will be acting unit chief until I get back. Y/N…why are you so worked up about this?” He asked, coming up behind me and hugging me, holding me against him. 

“We’ve never been apart. Not since Atlanta. And after everything we’ve been through the last 3 years…I don’t want you going away and not coming back.”

“I promise we’ll Skype every day. I have no intention of not coming back.”

“That’s what you say…then you get blown up by a rogue bomb,” I was pouting, but it was true. Aaron and I hadn’t been apart for more than a few days. I’d never been left alone to care for Jack. I knew Jessica would be around, but it still felt…way too real. 

“Y/N, I promise I will be coming back.”

“Aaron!” I yelled, running into his arms. He lifted me off my feet, hugging me tightly. He left the mission in Pakistan the minute we called and told him about finding Doyle.

“Oh god, I missed you so much,” I told him, kissing him all over his face. “Oh, this beard. Skype cannot accurately display the beauty that is this beard!”

He laughed and kissed me deeply. “I missed you too, Y/N.”

“Okay, focus. We’re working. You can get that beard between my thighs later,” I winked and dragged him down the hall to the interrogation room we were keeping Doyle in.

“She’s alive?” Garcia asked, tears welling in her eyes. 

“But we buried her…” Reid said.

“Like I said, I take full responsibility for the decision. If anyone has any issues they can be directed towards me.” Hotch declared.

“Any issues? Yeah I got a few issues,” Morgan countered. But then Garcia looked at the doorway. We all turned. And there she was. Alive and well. Emily Prentiss. 

“Emily…” I whispered. Reid got up and hugged her, as did Garcia. Morgan was staring at her in shock.

I turned to look at Hotch. I couldn’t describe what I was feeling in that moment. I stood up. “Emily, I’m so glad you’re alive, but I’m sorry I can’t be here right now.”

“Y/N-“ Hotch began to call after me.

I held up my hand telling him to stop and I walked out. 

The team were able to find Declan Doyle, and at the same time 4 international terrorists took themselves out. With Ian Doyle dead, there was nothing keeping Emily from returning to us. Except for when we all were put on trial.

Hotch found me at home. I was sitting at a dining room chair, like I had been for hours since I left the office. 

“Y/N, let me explain-“

“No. I don’t wanna talk to you. I don’t even wanna look at you right now. You lied to me.”

“It was to protect Emily.”

“And you think telling me my friend was alive was gonna hurt her? What do you think I was gonna do with that information, Aaron?”

“JJ and I were the only ones that knew, we made the decision to keep it that way.”

“Every night…for the last 7 months…I have cried. You let me grieve her, you let Jack comfort me. We’re supposed to be partners.”

“You know I didn’t want to hurt you, it was the best possible decision I could make.”

“Well you chose wrong.” I stood up, grabbing my bag from the bedroom.

“Where are you going?”

“To stay with Spencer. I can’t be here right now.”

“Y/N don’t do this.”

“You know who I am, Aaron. You knew that 7 months ago when you decided to lie to me. You knew I wouldn’t accept this, and you did it anyway.”

He stood in front of the door, blocking me. “I did. I know you inside and out, and I know how betrayed you feel. But I promise you, once you think on it with a clear head you’ll understand why I did it.”

“Then let me go so I can get some sleep and have a clear head.”

He stepped out of my way, and I left the apartment, calling Spencer in the car to let him know I was coming over for a couple days. 

A couple days turned into a week, then two, and I still felt just as angry as I did the moment I found out. Emily and I had talked, I understood what she had to do, I always had, and I was just happy she was back and alive. Spencer was pissed at JJ, and Morgan just seemed all around mad at the world, so there was a lot of tension on the team. But I missed Aaron, and Jack, I decided I couldn’t stay mad forever. If I had been in his shoes I would have done the exact same thing, and Aaron would have handled it a lot better than I was currently. 

Aaron convinced Rossi to give us all a cooking lesson at his mansion, to bring us back together as a family. Spence wasn’t sure he wanted to go, and I didn’t blame him. But Aaron had been right, and the longer I spent thinking about what they did, the more I understood it. It still hurt, and I was still angry, but I needed my family back. 

Emily answered the door when I rang the bell, and she hugged me tightly.

“I’m so glad you came,” she said, and I nodded. “Me too.”

“Guys, Y/N’s here!” she called out, leading me over to the kitchen where everyone was gathered. Aaron smiled at me when he saw me, and I smiled back. Rossi was still cooking the spaghetti, so Aaron came over and took my hand.

“Can we talk for a minute?” He asked, and I nodded. He led me to another room, and I saw Rossi smiling at us as we did.

“I wasn’t sure you would come,” he said, and I shrugged.

“I was hungry.” 

“Y/N…”

“Don’t. It’s okay. I was acting out cause I was hurt. I would have done the same in your situation. I get that.”

Aaron put his hands on my face and kissed me deeply. “I thought I’d lost you for good.”

“You know me…I always find my way back.”

We went back to the kitchen hand in hand, just as Rossi was finished the spaghetti and ready to continue his lesson. He winked at me, and I smiled. Just as he was explaining the texture of the noodles, the doorbell rang again, and this time Morgan went to answer it. 

He came back with Spencer, and we exchanged a look. That look said everything it needed to. We’d always be changed by what happened, but we were strong, and we could move on. I leaned into Aaron’s side while we listened to Rossi teach us how to cook a proper Italian meal.


	5. There's No Place Like Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader and Hotch deal with some big fights that test their relationship

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This doesn't really have anything to do with the episode I titled it after, other than it takes place around that time. I decided to write Beth in, but obviously she had to get kicked to the curb!
> 
> This chapter deals with some heavy stuff, so please keep that in mind.

I walked into Aaron’s office, with his pounding feet behind me. He slammed the door shut and I jumped. 

“Sit down,” he ordered, and I did, collapsing on the couch.

“You wanna explain to me what the hell that was? Where did you go?” He asked, sitting on his desk, arms crossed. 

“I can’t…”

“Yes you can, you won’t.”

“Fine, I won’t.”

“You’re suspended, give me your badge and gun,” he said, standing up and moving around his desk.

“Aaron…”

“It’s Agent Hotchner. Badge and gun, now.”

I swallowed back the tears I could feel beginning, and stood up. I unholstered my gun, placing it on the desk next to my badge.

“For how long, sir?” I asked, trying to add an edge to my voice. 

“Until I decide it’s safe having you back with this team.”

The words hurt me, and I stormed out, stopping at my desk to grab my bag. 

“Y/N, what happened?” Reid asked, walking over to me.

“I don’t wanna talk about it right now, Spence. I’ll call you later, okay?” I said, and when he nodded I stood on my toes and kissed his cheek. 

When I got in the car I realized my predicament. I couldn’t go home…because home was our apartment. I knew Aaron wouldn’t let me come back until I told him what caused my actions, and I wasn’t ready. I called Garcia and asked if I could stay with her for a few days. She knew something was wrong, obviously Morgan had told her what happened in the field. She immediately agreed. I already had a key to her apartment, so I went home and packed a weekend bag, hoping I wouldn’t need more than that. 

I wrote Jack a note, telling him I loved him and would see him in a few days. Jessica watched him after school until Aaron and/or I got home. Then I went straight to Garcia’s. 

Waking up in the morning, I groaned. Sleeping on a couch always gave me a crick in my neck. Penelope had insisted I share the bed with her, but I took the couch. 

“Good morning, princess,” she called from the kitchen. “Pancakes?”

“Ugh…how are you so cheery in the morning?”

“Cause I’ve had my coffee, come on, got some fresh for ya.”

I got up and dragged myself over to the island, sitting at the stool. She poured me a cup, and I added my cream and sugar. 

“So, you gonna tell me what the hell happened? As your best friend and not as your gossiping co-worker.”

“I fucked up on the case.”

“I got that much, sweetie. What happened?”

“I’m not…ready to discuss that with anyone yet. But I promise I will tell you.”

She nodded her understanding, and scooped me out a couple pancakes. 

“I will give you all the gossip on our unit chief when I get back,” she said, grabbing her stuff and heading into work. I sighed and grabbed my phone, checking my messages. 

He hadn’t even called or texted asking me where I was. That pissed me off more than anything. I would want to know he was okay if our situations were reversed. I understood his actions, to a point, as my boss, but as my boyfriend he was crossing the line. 

My self-imposed isolation lasted longer than I expected it to. Penelope offered for me to stay as long as I needed, but I no longer knew how long that would be. After five days of no contact with him, I booked myself a hotel room, and went back to the apartment to back up some more stuff. 

I wasn’t expecting him to be home. I almost turned around, but decided if he was going to give me the cold shoulder, I could do the same. It was my home too, I was allowed to be in it. I went straight to the bedroom, dumping my dirty clothes into the hamper and grabbing fresh ones, grabbing a weeks-worth. I could wash them if needed. I could feel him watching me, but I ignored him. 

“Going somewhere for a while?” He asked.

“Hotel. Can’t impose on my friends any longer,” I said, stuffing my socks down the side of the bag.

“That where you’ve been the last five days? At a friend’s?”

“Yes, not that you care since you didn’t even bother to ask me until now.”

I could practically hear him grinding his teeth. 

“Didn’t think you wanted to hear from me,” he responded.

“I didn’t.”

I didn’t hear him come up behind me, until suddenly I was being spun around. He gripped my arms, holding me in place.

“What is it Y/N? What is all this about? Is it about Tuck?”

“No, it’s about you!”

“You disappear on us in the middle of a case and this is about me?”

“Right now it’s about you. You didn’t even text me the last couple days.”

“Garcia told me you were staying with her, I knew you were safe.”

“Oh good, you’re getting my friends to snitch on me now. That’s great Aaron, let go of me so I can get out of here.”

“No, you need to talk to me. What the hell happened in Dallas? Where did you go?”

“I don’t wanna talk about it.”

“You don’t get to do that. You put the team at risk, you’re hiding things from me. I am your partner, Y/N.”

I pulled away from him and collapsed on the bed, putting my face in my hands. I mumbled my answer, but I knew he didn’t hear.

“What?” He asked.

“I said I was pregnant.”

Aaron knelt down in front of me, pulling my hands away from my face.

“Was?”

“I started to cramp, and felt the blood. I went to a clinic. They said I had a miscarriage. I wasn’t ready to talk about it. I knew you were pissed at me, but I couldn’t tell you.”

“Y/N, you didn’t have to go through that by yourself. You should have told me.”

“I didn’t even know I was pregnant. We’ve been so busy lately, with work and Jack…I’m worried that what Tuck did to me…made me lose the baby.”

“We don’t know that, hey, look at me, it’s gonna be alright,” he kissed me gently. “Does Garcia know?”

“No. I haven’t told anyone except you. Is it my fault, Aaron?”

“Absolutely not. Y/N…did you think I would blame you if you told me?”

“No…yes…I don’t know. I blame myself, why wouldn’t you?

“I’m not Spencer Reid, so I don’t have facts and statistics for you, but I know that a lot of women suffer miscarriages, especially in their first pregnancy. Even if what happened with Tuck caused this, it’s not your fault. Not even a little bit.”

“Aaron, I’m so sorry. I was so angry with myself, and then you weren’t communicating with me and I just thought…you must have known, and you hated me.” He hugged me and let me cry, eventually moving me so we lay on the bed as he cuddled me to him. I cried myself to sleep.

I told Penelope and Spencer, and they promised to keep it quiet from the rest of the team. I apologized for my actions in the field, and the team accepted them gladly. Aaron tiptoed around me for a few days, worried, but I was alright. I’d made an appointment to have my uterus and ovaries looked at. After the damage Tuck did to my stomach, it was easy for me to believe he had somehow taken this away from me, just like my mother had taken it away from him. 

My first case back involved a couple of bodies found dumped in a river in San Diego. Rossi and Morgan were at the crime scene, while the rest of us were at the precinct. Reid was explaining something he’d discovered about the geographic profile, I was sitting next to Hotch looking over the victim profiles, and JJ and Emily were out interviewing the families. There was a giant storm raging outside, and I wondered if the rain would cause us any problems. 

The lights flickered, and Reid stopped talking, looking up at the lights. He wasn’t shy about his fear of the dark, or as he liked to put it “the absence of light.”

The lights flickered some more and then went out completely. It took a couple seconds before the emergency lights came on, but they still left us mostly in the dark. 

“Great,” I muttered, grabbing my cellphone and checking the signal. I called Garcia and let her know we’d lost power, then did the same with Morgan and JJ. Morgan said he and Rossi were on their way back, the rain made it impossible to continue looking at the crime scene. JJ and Emily had one more family to interview and would meet us back at the hotel. 

“They’re saying the power won’t be back until late tonight,” Hotch told us, and I went over to pat Reid on the back. “We may as well go back to the hotel and start fresh in the morning.”

Reid wanted to wait and talk to Rossi and Morgan, so Aaron and I drove back to the hotel by ourselves. With no street lights or stoplights the roads seemed quiet, like we were in our own little world. I reached my hand over and grabbed Aaron’s crotch. 

“Y/n I have to drive us back to the hotel.”

“I know,” I replied, unzipping his pants. He just shook his head and continued driving to the hotel. 

“What would happen if I sucked your dick right now?”

“We’d probably crash.”

“Well you’ll just have to pay attention,” I told him, pulling his cock out and rubbing it to full hardness.

“Y/n, we’re almost there.”

“I’ll be quick then,” I unbuckled my seat belt and leaned into his lap, licking the tip.

“Jesus Christ,” he said, swerving a bit on the road. Then I saw the flashing lights.

“Oops...” Aaron glared at me as I sat up, tucking himself back in his pants and grabbing his license and badge while pulling over. The cop came over to the window as Aaron rolled it down.

“You been drinking tonight sir?”

“Actually officer I haven’t,” he flashed his badge and the cop took a look at it. “My girlfriend here is just being a bit distracting, she’s a bit drunk.”

I smiled and waved from my seat.

The officer looked between Aaron and me, and glanced down briefly. Aaron had forgot to zip his pants back up.

“I see,” he said with a chuckle. “Ma’am, if you could try and contain yourself until you get home”

“Will do officer!”

He nodded and went back to his car, and we waited for him to leave first.

“Well that went well,” I commented and Aaron got back on the road.

He glared at me and I laughed, putting my seatbelt back on. “It was worth a try.”

My slightly increased need for sex was explained pretty quickly when we got back to the hotel. 

“Ugh, babe can you bring me my tampons?” I called out to him, and he brought me in the box, handing it to me through the cracked door. “Damn the cramps are starting early.”

“I thought you didn’t really get cramps anymore,” he pointed out.

“I didn’t but that was because of the birth control.”

“Did you switch brands?”

“No, I stopped taking it,” I explained.

He pushed the door open a bit to look at me in the mirror. “When did that happen?”

“Recently. Just after…Dallas.”

“Shouldn’t we have discussed this?”

I finished up and opened the door, facing him fully. “Yeah. Well, let’s discuss it now.”

We walked over to the bed, and I sat down on it while he leaned against the dresser.

“You’re off birth control.”

“Aaron, the odds of getting pregnant while on the pill are like 1 in 100. I didn’t even think I was ready for a baby, but…it made me realize I am. I want to have a baby. With you. And yeah I should  
have told you first, and it’s probably really stupid, but-“

“Y/N. If you wanna have a baby, we can have a baby.”

“Do _you_ want a baby?” I asked seriously.

“If I put aside all my fears, there’s only one thing I want more in the world.”

“Which is?”

“For you to eventually agree to marry me,” he said, moving forward and leaning down to kiss me, holding my face in his hands.

“Well…we’re gonna have to hold off on baby making for the next few days…”

“Damn, I really wanted to get started,” he joked. I rolled my eyes. 

“Yeah, I bet you do.”

We tried for the next couple months, but it wasn’t happening. I was worried, but I tried to hide it from Aaron. My results from my ultrasounds showed that my uterus and ovaries were in perfect condition, so physically I should be able to carry a baby. The miscarriage still weighed on my mind, but I tried to be positive. We had plenty of time for a baby. 

Aaron was starting training for the FBI triathlon, which meant he really needed to work on his swimming and biking. I agreed to participate in the swimming, but I was out for biking and jogging.  
He got up way too early for my blood.

“You’re still going biking this weekend yeah?” I asked, cutting jacks sandwich in half.

“Yup,” Aaron responded from the bedroom.

“Usual route?”

“Yup.”

“Where’s your dirty running clothes, I’ll get them washed for tomorrow.”

“In my go bag by the door.”

I went over and grabbed his bag, taking it to the laundry room with me and grabbing our hamper on the way.

“Jack can you bring me your hamper please?”

“Yes!” I heard him banging around in his room before he carried his hamper in and dropped it by my feet.

“Thanks buddy. Your sandwich is on the table.”

He ran off to eat it, and I began sorting the clothes. Jack had a habit of leaving Legos in his pockets, so I always checked everyone’s pockets just in case. 

I found 5 Legos and a quarter in jacks clothes, and a tube of lip balm in mine. I pulled a business card out of Aaron’s running shorts, and looked at it.

“Babe come here a minute.”

Aaron came into the room, half dressed for work. We were meant to be off today, but he had to go in for a last minute meeting with Strauss and I was staying home with jack. 

“Who’s Beth Clemmons?” I asked, holding up the business card.

“Oh, she’s a woman I met while jogging the other day. She’s training for a triathlon too. We’re gonna cycle together this weekend.”

I gave him a look.

“What?”

“Nothing,” I said, handing him the business card and going back to laundry.

“No, what’s that look for?”

“You’re going cycling with a chick you met two days ago? Who just happened to have a business card on her during a run?”

“Y/n”

“I’m just saying, you’re a profiler, that seems suspicious to me.”

“Sweetheart, whatever you’re thinking I promise you that’s not gonna happen.”

“I know, I trust you.”

We were out as a team, blowing off steam after a tough case. JJ and will left Henry with Jack and Jessica, and the two boys were immediate friends. 

I was a bit drunk, or a lot drunk, sitting next to Spencer and chatting about 

Aaron had had a few, but he was mostly sober, since he was going to drive us home that night. Rossi was plastered, as were Emily and Garcia. 

A phone buzzed with a text next to me, and I grabbed it automatically, opening it and reading the message. My face immediately went into a scowl and I clicked the phone screen off, tossing it at Aaron. It was his phone, not mine. 

“It’s Beth,” I said dismissively, getting up and stumbling towards Garcia, Emily, and JJ who were dancing. 

“Who’s Beth?” I heard Spencer ask, as Aaron quickly read the message.

“Y/n!” Aaron called after me, but I ignored him and started dancing with my girls. I felt him behind me, trying to turn me to face him. 

“I’m busy,” I said.

“Y/n it’s not what you think,” he tried to explain. I could see the girls watching and pretending not to notice we were fighting.

“Whatever Aaron, I don’t care.”

He grabbed me around my waist and pulled me away from the dance floor. I kicked and hit at him, but quickly gave up. 

He pulled me into a corner and stood in front of me, blocking my exit.

“Beth was interested, but I told her I was already in a relationship.”

“Didn’t seem to stop her,” I said. “That message made a point.”

“I know, I’m sorry, I told her in passing but I guess she didn’t get the message.”

“No she didn’t. And she’s lucky I’m super wasted right now or I’d hunt her down and kick her stupid home-wrecking ass.”

“I love when you get angry,” he said, kissing me deeply. 

I slapped him, not hard but enough to get his attention.

“I’m pissed at you too.” I stormed back over to where the girls were dancing, and ignored Aaron. Garcia kept handing me shots of tequila, and eventually I stopped remembering what was happening. 

I woke up groggy and with the worst hangover headache I’d ever had. I rolled out of bed onto the floor, noting my lack of clothing besides a bra and panties. I pushed myself to sit up against the bed, and looked around. I expected to see our dresser, my full length mirror, the house plant I made Aaron buy. Instead, I saw a closet, a chess set, and a bookshelf filled with books that appeared to be in foreign languages. I recognised the room.

“Oh fuck…” I was in Spencer’s bedroom. I couldn’t remember what had happened the night before, not beyond being mad at Aaron and drinking some more. I reached down to feel my panties, which felt dry, so I didn’t think I’d had sex. Thank god. 

I stood up, hand immediately going to my head as it started pounding. 

“Spencer?” I called out, looking around for the dress I’d worn to the club. I heard footsteps, and Spencer appeared in the doorway, a towel wrapped around his waist, hair still wet from his shower. 

“Oh hey, you’re awake,” he said casually. 

“Spence…what the hell am I doing here?” I asked, “and where’s my dress?”

“You threw up on it, it’s in the wash. Here, you can borrow something.” He came into the room and opened his closet, grabbing a pair of sweatpants I’d never seen him wear and a t-shirt that was probably two sizes too big for him. He handed them to me and I took them. 

“Do I wanna know about these?” I asked, pulling the shirt over my head. It fit me looser than any of Spencer’s actual shirts would, which worked out since my boobs always stretched his. 

“I got them for you actually. You always stretch my clothes, not that you’re like big or anything, but I’m unusually thin and you’re a grown woman with curves, and I’m rambling again…”

I pulled the sweat pants on and looked at him. 

“Ok…so what happened last night?”

“You kept yelling about someone named Beth, and that you wanted to cut Hotch’s…well, you were mad. And super drunk. So we came back here, and you puked all over your dress and then threw it at me. Then you crawled into my bed and passed out.”

“Oh thank god.”

“Why, what did you think happened?”

“Nothing. That, obviously. Where’s my phone?” I looked around.

“Here,” he said, grabbing it from his dresser and tossing it to me. “Um…do you wanna wait in the living room while I get dressed?”

“What? Oh, right yeah, sorry.” I stared at his naked chest for what was probably way longer than appropriate and fled the room. Spence and I had been best friends for years, pretty much since I joined the BAU. But I’d never really paid any attention to what he looked like. He was thin, like he said, but he had more muscle tone than I expected of him. 

I immediately focused my attention to my phone, where I had 7 missed calls. 5 were from Aaron, 1 from Penelope, and 1 from Emily. I also had a million texts, mostly from Penelope who wanted to know all the gossip about Beth and Aaron. The rest were Aaron, trying to figure out where I was and to explain about Beth. 

I remembered that she’d texted him, and I’d gotten pissed when I’d read it, not that I could even remember what it said. I couldn’t remember if Aaron left first, or we did. I sent Penelope a quick text saying I would call her later when I knew what I was talking about. Then I called Aaron’s cell. 

He answered almost immediately.

“Y/N? Where the hell are you? I’ve been worried.”

“I’m at Spence’s.”

“Jesus, and you didn’t think to let me know?”

“I passed out, I’m sorry.”

“I’m coming to get you,” he said before hanging up. I groaned and tossed my phone aside. Spencer came out of his room, looking much more like Dr. Reid. 

“Was that Hotch?”

“Yeah…he’s super pissed at me. Why didn’t you tell him I was here?”

“You instructed me not to communicate with him in any way or you’d give me a purple nurple.”

“Fuck, I was really drunk last night…”

Spencer came over and sat next to me on the couch. “Wanna talk about it?”

“I barely even remember it.”

“Well who is Beth, and why are you so mad at her?”

“She’s this woman Aaron met while training. She sent him a text last night, I don’t remember what it said, but it pissed me off. Must have been pretty bad.”

“You were really mad at her.”

“And at Aaron too, apparently. Sorry about the purple nurple threat. I wouldn’t have actually done it…I don’t think.”

“No worries, I forgive drunk Y/N.”

I leaned in and kissed his cheek. “You really are the best friend a girl could ask for, Spence.” He blushed, and my profiler senses tingled, but I ignored them. We’d promised never to profile each other. 

“Want some water?” Spencer asked, getting up and moving to his kitchen.

“And some aspirin.” He grabbed both and brought them over to me, and I took the pills immediately, swallowing a mouthful of water with them. 

“So since I was out of it last night, you’re gonna have to prepare me for which Aaron Hotchner I’m gonna see in 5 minutes.”

“Hotch was upset, he left before we did.”

“Yeah, he seemed more upset than pissed on the phone. I really fucked up last night.”

“You were jealous, it’s a natural human emotion, especially since you and Hotch have been together for over 3 years.”

“We’ve been trying to have a baby,” I admitted.

“Really?” Spence sounded so excited. 

“Don’t worry, if I have any say, which I do, you’ll be godfather. Or one of the godfathers.”

I heard a banging on the door, and realized Aaron was already here.

“Well…there’s the boss.” I got up and hugged Spencer. “Thank you for taking care of me.”

“No problem, anytime.”

I walked over and opened the door, grinning sheepishly up at Aaron’s very unhappy face.

“Let’s go,” he said, walking back down the hallway. He didn’t even say hi to Spencer. 

“Bring my dress to work, okay? love you!” I called to Spencer as I jogged after Aaron. 

“Aaron, I’m sorry.”

“Let’s talk about it in the car.”

We were silent the rest of the way down the stairs, and I wondered if he took the stairs to punish me. The aspirin hadn’t kicked in yet and I felt like I was going to fall down. 

He opened my door for me though, and I got in, finding my sunglasses and putting them on immediately. He went around and got in the driver’s side, but didn’t start the car.

“Just…tell me you and Reid didn’t sleep together.”

“Well I don’t really remember, but Spence and I share a bed all the time-“

“You know that’s not what I meant.”

“You really think I had sex with Spencer? Because I was mad at you?”

Aaron sighed. “No. You wouldn’t do that.”

“Besides, he didn’t send me a text saying he wanted to ride me like a bike.”

“Y/N, I’m sorry, I’m sorry you read that, I’m sorry she sent it. I talked to her, told her I was in a serious relationship and that it was inappropriate. I’m not seeing her again.”

“Damn right you’re not.”

“Y/N, I love you. That’s not gonna change just because I meet a woman on a jog.”

“Is she pretty?”

“I have no idea,” he said, and I gave him a look that clearly said ‘yeah fucking right’. “When I think of beautiful, I only see you. I’m sure she’s attractive to other people.”

I leaned over and kissed him. “Ok Aaron Hotchner, you win this round.”

“Didn’t realize we were keeping score,” he joked.

“Of course we are. I’m winning, obviously. Now, let’s go home so I can cook up all the bacon we have.”

He laughed as he started the car and drove us home.


	6. Hit/Run

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hotch finally does the triathlon, there's an engagement and a wedding, and they say goodbye to a friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've now caught up to where I am in the show, so chapters will be a little less frequent now since I want to make sure I follow along with the general plot of the show.

“I’m never drinking again,” I complained, listening to the loud cheers all around me. We were at the FBI triathlon, waiting at the finish line for Aaron. The girls and I had gone out the night before, and we ended up drinking way too much.

“Couple hours, couple hours, you say. You guys didn’t come home until sunrise,” Reid mocked us.

“Why are you yelling?” JJ asked.

“Make him stop,” complained Emily. 

“Jack, earmuffs, earmuffs,” Morgan said to Jack, who was on his shoulders. Jack covered his ears. “What did you guys drink last night?”

“The green fairy…you’re FBI, can you make these people be quiet?” Penelope responded. Morgan just laughed at us. 

“By my calculations, Hotch should be finishing any time now,” Reid said, looking at his watch. 

“Do you see him Uncle Dave?” Jack asked Rossi.

“I think I do Jack, look there!” he pointed at Aaron, who had just rounded the corner and was now jogging the short distance to the finish line. Despite my massive hangover, I cheered loudly, watching my man cross the finish line. He stopped at the table where they gave out water and the medals. 

We all walked over, and Jack ran to hug his dad. Aaron put the medal over his head. 

“That’s for you, buddy,” he said. I walked up to him and kissed him lightly.

“And how’s my wild child?” he asked me. Aaron had to be up at 5 to be at the starting point, and I think we crossed paths as I came home. 

“Everything hurts…” I complained. He laughed and kissed the top of my head.

“We’re gonna get some food, you coming?” Morgan asked us, and we nodded. 

“Think we could sneak a little…sweaty time in the car?” I asked, half joking.   
“Think our son might complain,” Aaron said, as Jack ran ahead of us with the team. I sighed dramatically. Then I caught what he said. I stopped walking, pulling Aaron up short. 

“what?” he asked, looking at me. 

“You said _our_ son.”

“Did I?”

“Yes…”

Aaron turned to face me properly. “Y/N, I know Jack’s not your biological son, and I’m never gonna let him forget about Haley and who she was. But you’re as much his mother now as she was.” I leaned forward and kissed him before he could say anything else. 

“You know that thing you keep wanting to ask me?”

“Yes…” Aaron replied, looking at me quizzically. 

“Ask.”

“You want me to ask right here, right now? While I’m covered in sweat and you’re hungover.”

“Yup.”

Aaron shook his head and kissed me deeply. “Y/N Y/L/N, will you marry me?”

“Yes. I will.” He lifted me into his arms, and my legs wrapped around his waist. He kissed me again and carried me to the car. 

“Woah, woah, you two need to bring the love down a little bit, there’s a child present,” Morgan joked when he saw us. Aaron let me down, and the way he couldn’t stop smiling must have hinted to the team that something was up.

“What? What happened?” Garcia asked, her nose perking at the idea of gossip. 

“Y/N finally agreed to marry me,” Aaron replied.

Garcia started crying immediately, while Rossi cheered and came over to kiss me, spouting off in Italian. Reid was holding Jack’s hands up in a cheer, and JJ and Emily hugged us both. Morgan patted Aaron on the back. “Took you two long enough.”

When we finally got home after lunch, since it had turned into a giant celebration of our engagement, Aaron went to take a much needed shower. Jack and I curled up on the couch.

I heard Aaron call for Jack, and he got up to run to his dad. I just stayed on the couch, curious but tired. The lunch had helped the hangover, but I still needed a full nights sleep to really fix it. Just then Jack came running back into the living room and stopped in front of me. 

“Hey buddy.”

Jack got down on one knee, making sure he was in the right position, and held up the ring box to me. “Y/N, will you marry us?” I heard Aaron come out of the bedroom, wearing a pair of sweats and a tee shirt. 

I couldn’t help it, I started to cry. I picked Jack up, sitting him on my lap and kissing his head.

“There’s nothing I want more in the world, Jack. Now, you gonna put that ring on me?” He nodded and opened the box, taking the ring out. I held up my hand and pointed to the correct finger, and he slid it on. 

“Wow it’s so beautiful.”

“Just like you,” Aaron said, now standing behind the couch. I looked up at him. “Jack wanted to make sure you said yes to him too.”

I hugged Jack to me. “Jack, if you had asked me years ago, I would have said yes to you.”

Aaron pretended to be hurt, but he came around and sat next to Jack on the couch. He took my left hand and kissed it. 

“You know this means we have to let Rossi plan the party,” Aaron told me.

“Oh no, he goes way overboard. Between him and Penelope it’s gonna be the entire state of Virginia there.”

“We should keep them separate, just in case.”

“You know he’s gonna plan your bachelor party,” I joked.

“Don’t remind me…”

We had a hostage situation at the bank, and Will had gone inside in order to allow some of the hostages to leave. The male unsub, Chris, shot Will at least two times before the camera feed cut out. JJ freaked out, and we had to pull her into the mobile command center before she ran inside after him. Eventually all of the hostages came out, and we moved to go in. Will wasn’t with them.  
I went into the side entrance of the bank with two SWAT officers. JJ and Morgan were going in the front. Just as we got inside an explosion rocked the bank, sending me flying.  
It knocked me silly, but I was alright, and went inside to try and locate some survivors. An older couple had been hiding beneath the teller station, and the older man was unconscious. I waited with them until a medic came for them. JJ and Morgan went downstairs to search for Will and the unsubs.

Aaron figured out that the female, Izzy, and her secret partner were using Will to gain access to the train station in order to blow it up. We went to the train station, and we arrived as they were moving civilians out. Morgan called that he spotted the male unsub, and I went upstairs looking for Will. 

“I’ve got Will,” I called into my mic, running over to where he was chained up. I ripped the duct tape off his mouth and looked at the bombs strapped to him.

“How long before bomb squad gets here?” I asked the team.

“3 minutes out,” Aaron replied. I didn’t tell him that Will and I would be dead before then. The bomb was attached to a trigger cellphone, old as hell, and the countdown showed less than 3   
minutes.

“Get outta here, y/n,” Will told me, and I shook my head.

“Not today LaMontagne. We got a bomb to diffuse. Okay, this is all about them, their love story, they met in 2008, so let’s try it.” I tried that combo and a 3 strike system came up on the bomb   
telling me I had 2 attempts left. 

“Y/n.”

“Just let me think for a minute.”

Will looked down at the bomb, “that’s about all the time we got.” I glared at him.

“They met in Chad...” I tried that combo and another strike appeared. “Fuck.”

“Y/n, you gotta get outta here.”

“Will, if you don’t shut up.”

“Izzy, her name is Izzy,” he said. I looked at him. 

“Last try.” He nodded, and I typed it in. The bomb deactivated and we both sighed in relief. Until a panel on his chest popped open with another bomb, this time only giving me 30 seconds. It had 3 wires attached.

“Oh for fucks sake,” I said, looking at it. “Ok three wires, red yellow blue, the flag of Chad, only one different than the US flag is yellow.”

“You sure about this?” Will asked, and I nodded. I cut the yellow wire, and the bomb stopped with 2 seconds remaining. 

“You’re one lucky woman,” Will said, and I nodded. 

“Let’s not tell Aaron about this.” Will nodded his agreement.

We were at Rossi’s house, which he had decorated up for the surprise for JJ. Morgan was talking to Emily, but he took Jack and went to look at the foundation Rossi had in the backyard. I could tell something was going on with Emily, so I just hugged her and let Aaron talk to her. He was our boss, and I know he would tell me later that night. 

We surprised JJ and Will with a wedding, though really just JJ. Her mom came up to Virginia with her wedding dress, and JJ looked magical. Spence was wearing a bow tie just like Henry, and they made an adorable pair. After the ceremony we got to really party, dancing and having a blast with our teammates. Rossi grabbed me first, dancing me around the makeshift dance floor. 

“It’s gonna be your wedding soon, bella,” he said to me, and I nodded. 

“I know, seems odd that JJ and Will have been engaged for a day and are already married. That’s how they are I suppose, it’s perfect for them.”

“You better let me plan the after party,” Rossi demanded.

“Oh no, you’ll go way overboard.”

“Exactly.” I just shook my head in amusement. Morgan came over and grabbed me for the next dance. We chatted about whether we thought Rossi would get married again, and if Morgan would, then Spencer came for his turn. 

“I like the bow tie, you should wear that more often,” I told him.

“Henry picked it out.”

“Kid’s got good taste. Spence, while you’re here...I wanted to ask you something.”

“Sure.” 

“Will you be my man of honour?”

“You want me to be your...really?” I nodded.

“You’re my best friend. Penelope is gonna stand with me, and JJ probably will too, and Emily, but I didn’t want Aaron to take you.”

Spencer lifted me up, spinning me around while I shrieked, trying not to kick anyone.

“I have no idea how to do it, but absolutely!”

Aaron came over then, noticing our cheer.

“Can I steal my fiancée back now?” He asked, and Spence nodded, kissing my cheek before going to find Emily. 

“You know we could just do this too,” he said to me.

“We could. But I kinda want a big party.”

“You’re just gonna draw out this engagement forever,” he joked.

“Maybe.” 

We danced for a few songs, then the girls grabbed me so we could have a bonding moment. I could see in Emily’s eyes that she was saying goodbye, and I would annoy her about it tomorrow. 

We drank and danced for hours, until Jack passed out and we needed to get him home. Aaron carried him to and from the car, and I tried to stay awake for the ride. Aaron put Jack into his bed, helping him get off his dress clothes and leaving him to sleep in his underwear. 

“Is Emily leaving?” I asked him when he came back out of Jack’s room.

“I don’t know, we’re going to have a meeting tomorrow morning. But I think so.” He came over and gave me a reassuring kiss. “She’s not faking her death this time.”

I smacked his chest. “ _You_ faked her death. Just, nobody fake anybody’s death again.”

“Agreed.”

I waited for Aaron and Emily to have their talk, and by the look on both their faces when it was over, I had my answer. I walked over to Emily.

“So where you going that’s better than us?” I joked, but it couldn’t cover the sadness in my voice.

“Ester offered me the leadership in the London Office for Interpol.”

“Damn, that is indeed better than us.”

Emily laughed and hugged me, holding me tightly. “You know I’m gonna miss you guys so much.”

“Not as much as we’ll miss you,” I promised. “You better plan on being back for the wedding.”

“Of course, I wouldn’t miss it.”

“And make sure to fill me in on all the hot British men.”

“Why would I do that when I can keep them all for myself?” She said, linking her arm up with mine as we walked to the break room. The rest of the team wasn’t in yet.

“That’s just not fair, Prentiss.”

“You’re literally getting married to our unit chief, you have nothing to say.”

“True, he is pretty gorgeous. And manly. And buff.”

“Please, don’t continue. I still have respect for Hotch,” Emily laughed. We sat and drank coffee while we waited for the others to arrive. It was our last quiet moment together, Emily officially resigned from the FBI and moved to London to run Interpol within the month. Garcia and Morgan went to London to visit, Morgan was on temporary duty and Garcia went to see the Olympics, but they also went to help Emily get settled. I was gonna miss her, but she did what was best for herself, and she had a wedding to come back for. Knowing she was alive, and happy, made it so much easier than the last time I’d had to say goodbye to her.


	7. Zugzwang Part I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader helps out her friends during tough times.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter isn't very reader/aaron centric, so I threw in some smut to keep ya'll entertained.
> 
> next chapter will be dealing with The Replicator!

Spencer had tried to hide it from me, but I knew him far too well. I caught him at a phone booth one Sunday, and waited for him to finish his call from a safe distance. Once he started to leave, I ambushed him.

“Who were you talking to?” I asked him, making him jump. 

“Y/N, what…what are you doing here?” He asked, nervously.

“You’ve been acting weird. So I followed you. Who were you talking to on a pay phone?”

“That’s…that’s not really any of your concern,” he said, moving to walk past me.

“Spence,” I grabbed his arm, stopping him, “you know I love you, and I would never tell anyone about anything. Is it about your headaches?”

“No, I haven’t had one in like 6 months, since I-“

“Since what?”

“Can we…talk about this somewhere else?” He asked, and I nodded.

“I’ll drive you home,” I told him, and we walked to where I had parked my car, around the corner so he wouldn’t see it. When we got to his apartment, I followed him upstairs.

“You’re really not gonna let this go, huh?” he asked, letting me in.

“Nope.”

“You can’t tell anyone, like no one, no one on the team, not even your mom,” he warned me. 

“Spencer, are you in trouble?”

“No, no I’m fine. 6 months ago I contacted a geneticist to consult on my headaches. We…got to know each other.”

“You have a secret girlfriend?”

“No!” he answered too quickly.

“You do!”

“She’s not my girlfriend…she’s just. I really like her, but she’s in trouble so we can’t meet.”

“You’ve never even met her?” I questioned.

“I don’t need to. She’s amazing, she’s smart, and funny, and-“

“Ok, ok Spence. I get it. She’s perfect for you. But if she’s in trouble, why don’t you tell the team, we could help her.”

“She won’t let me. Even telling you about her is dangerous.”

“Spence, you know I wouldn’t tell anyone if you asked me not to.” I took his hand and squeezed it. “Does she make you happy?”

“Unbelievably so.”

“Well then I’m happy. And she obviously figured out what was causing the headaches, so she scores some points with me.”

Spencer hugged me, something he didn’t usually initiate. “Thank you, y/n.”

“For what?”

“For being my best friend. For caring.”

“I love you Spencer Reid, I would do anything for you.”

“Hey, where did you run off to?” Aaron asked when I got home.

“Oh, just had an errand to run, then I ran into Spencer so I drove him home,” I replied, dropping my purse on the table near the door. “Jack still with Jessica?”

“Yeah, I’m picking him up after supper.”

“Good, that gives us a few hours alone,” I said, walking over to him. He was cutting up some tomatoes, but he turned to me when I spoke.

“And what exactly did you have in mind, Mrs. Hotchner?”

“It’s not Mrs. Hotchner yet, sir.”

He put the knife down and quickly dried his hands with the dish towel, grabbing me around the waist and kissing me deeply.

“You haven’t called me that in a while,” he said, kissing down my neck.

“Well we’ve been busy, sir.” He groaned, grabbing my ass and lifting me up so I wrapped my legs around his waist. He carried me into the bedroom and dumped me on the bed. 

“Strip.”

I did as he ordered, pulling my sundress off over my head, leaving me with no bra and my panties. 

“You walked around with no bra all day?” he asked, grabbing my breasts and squeezing them. I moaned as I nodded. 

“Just gonna let any random person see your nipples when a breeze hit you?” he asked, pushing me to lay down and pulling my panties off. I shook my head.

“I bet they could, they probably fantasied about what they’d do to them, maybe they’d lick them,” he suggested, licking first my left then right nipple, causing them to peak immediately. 

“Or maybe they’d suck them,” he pulled one into his mouth, sucking on it and causing me to moan loudly. 

“The way you teased those poor men…”

“Guess you’ll have to punish me, sir.”

Aaron practically growled, pulling his tee shirt off and undoing his jeans, pushing them to the floor along with his boxers. “Get on your hands and knees.”

I did as he told me, sticking my ass in his face and turning to look at him over my shoulder. He shoved two fingers into me, feeling how wet I was. 

“How long have you been thinking about this? You’re soaked.”

“Pretty much all morning…”

“Poor Reid…” he mocked, pulling his fingers out and shoving his cock inside me. I groaned, rocking forward, but he grabbed my hips and kept me upright, using my hips as leverage to pull me into him as he thrust. 

“You know…they probably did see my nipples…cause I was thinking about you fucking me all morning…”I moaned as his hips connected with mine. 

“Trying to get me to punish you?” He questioned, slapping my ass.

“No, sir. I would never ask for punishment.”

“Liar.” He slapped my ass again, before a particularly hard thrust that had me gasping for air. 

“Fuck, do that again.”

He complied, and I moaned loudly. 

“Aaron…make me cum. Now.”

“Yes, ma’am,” he reached a hand off my hip and down to my clit, rubbing it in circles with his thumb. His other hand reached forward and wrapped around my neck from the front, putting pressure on it. The three sensations combined – the choking, his thumb, and the feel of him fucking me senseless – were enough, and I screamed out my orgasm. Aaron followed shortly after, finishing inside me and pulling out. I fell flat on my stomach as he let me go, and he rolled me over to look up at him. 

“So…pick a honeymoon spot yet?” He asked casually, and I burst out laughing.

“What’s up with you today?” I asked Spencer, finding him hiding in a back room working on the geographic profile. Our unsub was collecting and disposing of male victims too quickly, we needed to narrow down our search. “Is it about phone girl?”

“She wants to meet,” he answered sadly.

“That’s amazing, so her trouble got cleared up?” I asked, sitting down.

“Yeah…”

“You don’t wanna meet her?”

“I do, I mean, regardless of how she looks, she’s the most beautiful girl in the world to me.”

“But…?”

“But what if she doesn’t like me?”

“Why wouldn’t she like you?”

“I’m weird. My hair’s too long, my tie is perpetually crooked…”

“Your hair is fine.”

“My mom thinks it’s too long…and my Aunt Ethel.”

“Well you aren’t dating them. I love your hair. Besides, she sounds like a female version of you, which means she already thinks you’re the most handsome man in the world. And if she doesn’t, I’ll kick her ass.”

Spencer laughed. “She wants to meet right when we get back.”

“Then do it.” I took his hand and squeezed it. “You deserve a little happiness in your life, Spence. Besides me, obviously.”

“Thank you, y/n.”

“We got here as soon as we could, what’s going on?” Aaron said, as we walked into his office. Spencer was already there, waiting for us.

“I need your help,” he said. I closed the door behind us.

“Is this about Maeve?” I asked, and he nodded.

We filled Aaron in, Spencer had already told me all about Maeve and her stalker. Aaron was concerned, but I could tell he wasn’t sure.

“So you don’t know her last name, what she looks like, where she lives, or where she works? How do you know she’s missing?” he asked as I held Spencer’s hand. 

“Maeve and I gave each other code names in the beginning when we were writing letters. The man on the phone called himself Adam Worth. He’s the real life person Sir Arthur Conan Doyle based the character of Moriarty on. He took her.”

“Okay,” Aaron said, believing Spencer.

We called in the rest of the team and filled them in on what was going on.

“Help me find her, please,” Spencer begged us.

“We don’t know if we have a case, so we’ll be working this on personal time. Anyone wanna leave?” Aaron asked, and no one got up. “Ok, let’s get to work, then.”

Spence and I sat across from each other at a chessboard in the park.

“You wanna talk here? You hate chess.”

“I only hate it cause you always win. Besides, I want you focused on the game, not my questions,” I replied, moving my pawn forward. 

“When you think of Maeve, what comes to mind?”

“Thomas Merton.”

“Why Thomas Merton?”

“She wrote a quote of his in the book she left for me at the restaurant.”

“Then Thomas Merton was her way of saying goodbye,” I concluded.

We played as I asked him questions, as we went through their conversations from the past 6 months, trying to find something. 

We got to the loft that Diane owned, and found a box sitting on the step. Spencer went and took it, opening it up.

“Is that a blindfold?” Morgan asked, and Spencer nodded.

“Take off your gun and vest, come in alone,” Diane’s voice came through the speaker box. 

“Spence,” I interjected, but he shook his head, taking off his vest and gun and handing them to Aaron. Spence went inside alone, and we all waited outside, hoping he would walk out with Maeve. Eventually we heard a gunshot, and went in. By the time we got to the room, Spencer was getting up off the ground with a graze in his arm, and Diane had a gun to Maeve’s head.

“You lied!” Diane cried out.

“I didn’t. I offered you a deal, and you can still take it. Me for her, remember?”

“You would kill yourself, for her?” 

“Yes,” Spencer agreed.

“Thomas Merton,” Maeve said to him.

“Who’s Thomas Merton? What does Thomas Merton mean?” Diane was losing it.

“Something you can never take from us,” Maeve replied.

Everything happened so quickly then. Diane moved the gun to her own head, and I heard Spencer call out. Then Diane and Maeve were on the ground, their blood pooling together. I immediately lowered my gun, putting it back in the holster and moving to Spencer. I grabbed his arm just as he sank to the ground, and I went with him, hugging him from behind. 

We sat there for what felt like hours, though I knew it couldn’t have been that long. I saw EMTs come in, crime scene analysts and the coroner. Aaron finally nodded at me, telling me it was time to go.

“Spence…we gotta go now.”

“No.”

“Spence, honey, they have to move Maeve…and they can’t do that while we’re still here. You don’t want her to stay here.”

He nodded, and we stood up together. I never let go of his arm. 

“I’m gonna drive him home,” I said to Aaron, and he nodded his understanding. I walked Spencer out of the loft, and helped him into the car. He stayed silent the whole ride home. 

We attended Maeve’s funeral together. He wouldn’t let the others come. He had tried to keep me out as well, but I had a key, and he gave up, as long as I didn’t touch anything or try to clean up. He had books everywhere, scattered over the floor where he had obviously thrown them. I ignored them. I sat in the chair while he curled up on the couch. I didn’t know what to do for him except be there. When I couldn’t be there – when we were on a case – I made him text me. It was usually just a period, letting me know he was at least conscious. But it was enough, for now.

I was at the office, getting ready to go in to the conference room for our briefing, when Morgan came over to me.

“Hey. You’re the only one Reid’s been talking to. How’s he doing?”

“Well, he’s not talking to me. He barely acknowledges my presence. He’s absolutely devastated.”

“Damn, I wish there was something we could do for him.”

“We just have to let him work it out, give him time. I’m keeping him fed and somewhat clean, it’s the most we can do right now.”

I gave Aaron a kiss as we entered the conference room, before sitting down and looking at the projector Garcia was standing in front of. “Thank you for the mixed nuts and seeds, Penelope. I’ll make sure he eats them.”

She smiled at me, and then Aaron gave her the go-ahead to begin the briefing.

We ended up in Chicago, home of one Derek Morgan, for a new case where two men had been murdered shortly after interacting with kids. JJ and Rossi were at one crime scene, while Derek, Blake, and I were at the other. JJ called Derek, and she was asking him something. He pulled the grate down that kept the store secure. 

“What is she saying?” Blake asked. But Derek didn’t respond, just stared at the words written on the grate. ‘Look Up To The Sky’ were painted there, and I learned they were at the second crime scene as well.

“I know what this is,” he said finally. “We need to get the team together.”

“It’s about Carl Buford,” he told us, and we all look fairly confused. Blake was the only one of us who hadn’t been on the team the last time we’d dealt with Carl Buford.

“Who’s Carl Buford?” she asked. Morgan seemed to struggle with what he wanted to say, but he explained anyway. How Carl had abused and molested him as a boy, and how killed other boys when they found out his secret 6 years back.

“Look up to the sky, that’s what he said when I was beginning to put up a fight. When I wanted him to stop. Look up to the sky, stop being a sissy boy.”

“He’s done this to other boys,” I concluded.

“I thought it was just me, then James, he’s been doing this for years, probably before me and definitely after.”

“So one of his other victims is murdering these men, based on simple interactions they have with children,” Aaron stated.

“Something must have been his trigger. We know what the stressor was, something happened recently. We need a list of names. and there’s only one person who can give us that. I need to go see Buford,” Morgan said, and I shook my head.

“Derek, you don’t need to do that. One of us can go,” I told him.

“No, it has to be me.”

Morgan got the list of names, and we chose a suspect from them. He turned out to be just a generic weed smoker, but he knew more names. Names that Buford left off the list. One of them was a known drug dealer, one that Morgan had had problems with ever since he was a kid. We were waiting for Garcia to get us the address.

“You aren’t the only one trying to hide in the dark, you know,” I said to Morgan. We were the only two in the room.

“Don’t know what you’re talking about, Y/L/N.”

“For darkness restores what light cannot repair.”

“Joseph Brodsky,” Morgan recognized.

“It’s easier in the dark. To heal. They tell you to be out there, in the open, getting the sunshine and allowing yourself to live. But that’s not enough, sometimes. Sometimes you gotta crawl into that dark hole and let your body rebuild itself. And eventually it does. It has for me, so far anyway. I don’t talk to Aaron about Charles Tuck. Don’t talk to Spencer about it either. I keep it to myself, my feelings, all of them, bad and good ones. And you don’t have to talk to me about Buford. Just know that I’m with you, in the darkness, if you ever need a hand to hold.”

Morgan got up and came over to me, kissing me on the head. “Thank you, baby girl.”

We were on the jet, taking off and heading for home. Derek had just put his moms cobbler in the fridge for Penelope, but he promised there was enough for everyone. As he sat down his phone rang, and he answered it. We could all tell it wasn’t a good call.

When he hung up, he was quiet for a minute. “Carl Buford is dead.”

No one knew what to say, there wasn’t anything that could be said, but I got up and sat across the aisle from Derek and held out my hand to grab his. He took mine and squeezed. We both lived in our own dark holes, but sometimes, our darkness touched.


	8. Zugzwang Part II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Reader and Aaron learn some exciting news, we get to meet Aaron's brother, and The Replicator finally makes his appearance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is immediate smut, be warned!

Aaron swung the door shut, immediately grabbing me and kissing me, his tongue pushing into my mouth. We’d just come back from a difficult case, and for about 3 minutes I had been held hostage by the unsub. To Aaron it felt like 3 years.

He pushed me against the desk, and my hands went out to steady myself. I ended up pushing his files and pictures off the desk. He didn’t waste any time, pushing my skirt up around my waist and my panties to the side. He unbuckled his belt, pulling his cock out and shoving it inside me. I kept one hand on the table, holding myself up, the other went down his back. 

“Fuck, Aaron!” 

He kissed down my neck, one hand reaching under my blouse and my bra, grabbing my breast. 

As he thrust into me, I could feel him stretching me. We normally had more foreplay, and the width of his cock was almost too much. But it felt far too good. 

He was thrusting harder than he ever had before, and I could tell he was trying to release all his frustration and anger. I could take it, I wanted to take it, I reached down and gripped his ass, urging him to go deeper, even harder. 

“I can’t...can’t lose you...” he said, kissing me again. 

“You won’t,” I moaned into his ear. 

He moved one hand down, rubbing my clit furiously. 

“Fucking Christ, Aaron, fuck me.”

His other hand gripped my thigh, pulling it higher against him to have better access to me. As I felt myself beginning to come, I kissed him deeply, releasing my moans into his mouth. He rubbed me through my orgasm, not relenting his pace and pounding into my cervix. I gripped his hair with both hands, quickly climbing to another orgasm as he continued to rub my clit.

His thrusts grew sloppy, until he thrust completely in, releasing inside me with a long groan. 

He pulled out, quickly getting to his knees and licking my clit, shoving three fingers into me. 

I gripped his hair tighter, feeling myself reach the peak again. I covered my mouth with one of my hands, keeping my shouts silenced. When I was finished, he stood up, grabbing me and carrying me over to the couch and collapsing on it with me on his lap.

“I love you so much,” I whispered to him, panting in his ear. 

He pushed hair away from my face, kissing me. 

I heard a gentle rap at the door, followed by Rossi’s voice.

“If you two lovebirds could try and remember my office is right next door, I’d appreciate it. Goodnight.”

We laughed as we fixed our clothes, getting ready to go home.

Aaron was doing paperwork, and I was sitting on the couch, watching him. He always got so focused when he did reports, probably forgot I was even there. I just sipped my tea and watched him, enjoying the sound of his pen across the paper, the way his hands flipped the pages. 

Eventually he stopped, staring down at a piece of paper I’d slipped into the file. He read it, then looked up at me, remembering I was there.

“Is this…what I think it is?” He asked, holding up the medical paper I’d slipped in. They were the results of a blood test I’d taken. I just nodded, sipping my tea again.

“You’re pregnant.”

“I’m pregnant.”

Aaron pushed his chair away from the desk, rushing over to me and kneeling in front of me. “How long have you known?”

“Officially, about a week. But I’ve been suspicious for a couple.”

“You’ve known for a week and you didn’t tell me?” He asked, but he couldn’t stop smiling.

“We were busy with that case in Jacksonville, figured I’d wait til we had a quiet moment to ourselves.” I put my cup of tea down, knowing it would get spilled if I didn’t. Aaron grabbed my hands and pulled me to stand with him, kissing me over and over again. 

“We’re having a baby,” he said, whispering it into my lips.

“We’re having a baby,” I agreed, kissing him.

We told Jack first, then Jessica. Then my parents. Then it was time to tell the team. I was about 3 months along, and the doctor said it was okay to start telling people. I’d been just over a month when I’d miscarried before.

I was already sitting in the conference room, waiting for the team to arrive. Aaron was in a meeting with Strauss, informing her. 

Garcia was first, followed by Morgan and Blake, then Rossi, and finally JJ and Spencer sneaking their way in before Aaron arrived.

“Before we go over the briefing, Y/N and I wanted to share something with you all,” Aaron announced.

“Tell me you didn’t elope?” Rossi questioned, and we shook our heads. I stood up, lifting my shirt to show where my belly was beginning to show. 

“You’re pregnant!” Garcia yelled, standing up and touching my stomach gently.

“That’s one announcement,” I stated, and they all waited to hear the other, “I’m pregnant with twins.”

“OMG!” Garcia screamed, hugging me. Spencer got up and came over to hug me as well.

“When did you find out?” JJ asked.

“A few weeks ago,” Aaron answered.

“You kept this from me for weeks?” Penelope complained, and I shrugged. 

“You know now.”

“This does mean Y/N will be on temporary special duty until her maternity leave begins. No going to crime scenes or suspect interviews,” Aaron commanded. I rolled my eyes.

“Basically I’m on house arrest.”

The team laughed, and Rossi came over to give me a quick kiss and a “congratulations, bella!” before we had to begin our briefing. 

Aaron and I had decided to take a vacation since we were in a quiet spell at work. We took the train up to New York with Jack, and I had made a giant list of things to see. Aaron thought I was being unrealistic, but I knew I’d get my way.

We were curled up in bed, Jack having just fell asleep, with the twins kicking away at my internal organs, when Aaron’s phone rang.

“Rossi remembers we’re on vacation, right?” I asked, but Aaron looked at the caller ID.

“It’s Sean.”

“Your brother Sean?” He nodded before answering the phone. He agreed to meet his brother somewhere, after confirming that Sean was a witness to something. He hung up and looked at me.

“That sounded serious, is he okay?”

“He’s fine, I just have to go help him with something. I won’t be long,” he kissed me gently and I hummed into the kiss. 

“Tell him I said hi.”

Aaron called me less than an hour later. “I’m sorry sweetheart, we might have a case.”

“What’s going on? Is Sean okay?”

“He’s fine. But we’ve got two victims who bled out of every orifice they have, and so far both are connected to Sean.”

“Get back here, we’ll get the team informed.”

“No, stay there with Jack. They think the victims were dosed with ecstasy. I’m going to the police station to conference in the team. I don’t want you working this right now.”

“Aaron, I’m pregnant, not disabled.”

“Yes, you are, and if you were to come into contact with whatever is killing these people you or the twins could die. I’ll call you and keep you informed. I love you.”

“Love you too,” I said, clicking off the call. 

Turns out these murders may have had nothing to do with Sean. Aaron found more victims, and by the time the team got on the jet the next morning we had a club full of bodies. 11 victims in total. Aaron called to keep me updated, as promised, but I was still kept off the case.

“I’m sorry Y/N, this case is a mess.”

“I know babe, I’m fine here. Jack and I are gonna see the Statue of Liberty.”

“That sounds like fun, hey put him on okay.” I did as he asked.

“Hi dad!” Jack said. He was 7 now, I couldn’t believe how big he was getting. 

“But you’ll miss the Statue of Liberty!” he complained, and I could barely hear Aaron explaining about working. “It’s okay dad, if someone’s in trouble you should help them.”

He gave me back the phone, and I said goodbye to Aaron, making him promise to keep me updated throughout the day. He ended up calling me just after we finished at the Statue.

“Y/N, I want you to interview Sean.”

“Me, why?”

“He won’t tell me the truth, but he needs someone he knows.”

“Okay, text me the address we’ll be there soon,” I hung up with him and turned to Jack, “hey Jack, we gotta go to the police department for a bit and see dad and the team. Uncle Sean is there too.”

“He is? Cool!”

When we got to the precinct, Aaron filled me in on everything so that I was prepared. I took his notebook from when he had questioned Sean originally. I went into the interview room.

“Y/N? Damn it’s been a while…and you are super pregnant,” Sean greeted me.

“Yes, with twins. And I’m not super pregnant, just pregnant. I’m gonna be interviewing you,” I informed him, sitting down, my stomach keeping me further away from the table than I was used to. 

“What happened to Aaron?”

“With cases like this we try and have an unbiased person conduct the interview.”

“You’re my sister-in-law, not really unbiased.”

“Not yet, and I also barely know you. So, how well did you know the victims?”

“Linda and I were dating,” he said, almost sadly.

“Were? You told Aaron she was your girlfriend.”

“She was. We had a fight, we were working it out.”

“What was the fight about?”

“My using. It’s been 2 months, Linda helped me get clean.”

“What drugs did you use?”

“I’d rather not say.” Just then Aaron burst into the room.

“You’d rather not say? Are you serious, Sean? 11 people are dead including your girlfriend. You said you’d told me everything!”

“I’m clean now, I didn’t think it was important!”

“What drugs did you use, Sean?”

“Ecstasy.” Aaron stormed out of the room, slamming the door, and I sighed, looking at Sean.

“You deal with that every day?” he asked me, gesturing to his brother.

“Yes. Willingly.” Sean just shook his head.

Sean Hotchner was a lot like his older brother, despite arguing he wasn’t. He agreed to wear a wire and go back to the club to try and figure out if he boss had drugged the wine bottles. It was something Aaron would have done. I took Jack out to the 9/11 memorial site to keep him entertained. There wasn’t anything I could do to help with the case at the moment.

Later that afternoon I got a call from Aaron.

“Hey babe, how did he do?” I asked, holding Jack’s hand as we walked down the busy New York street.

“He’s gone.”

“Gone? Gone where?”

“He left his phone. He freaked out during the operation, attacked Thane. The club owner, Peters, is on the run.”

“Ok, just, meet us at the precinct.” I hailed a cab, and let Jack climb in first, giving the driver the address.

That night, Peters was found murdered in his car outside his apartment. Aaron went to the scene, and when he came back he looked defeated.

“What’s wrong?” Jack was sleeping in one of the offices.

“Sean’s still missing.”

“You don’t really think he killed Peters? Sean’s got problems, but he’s not a murderer.”

Aaron sat down beside me at the table. “He was just a kid when I got shipped off to boarding school. I was always the troublemaker. Eventually, I decided I needed to get my act together. Don’t think that’s ever occurred to Sean.”

We eventually figured out it was the father of a girl who'd died from an overdose at Peters other club. We also found out that Sean was the one who had sold the tainted wine to the convenience store, where 3 innocent people bought it and died. He knew he was in trouble, and he took it like a Hotchner. He went willingly. He would be in trouble, lots of it, but Aaron knew some very good lawyers. Sean hadn't known the wine was tainted, so he'd get off on accidental manslaughter. 

Not twenty minutes after Sean was taken away, Penelope called us saying her entire system was hacked by The Replicator.

We had two officers guarding Jack, who was asleep in the hotel. Dave called Aaron to say Strauss was missing, and we rushed to her room to meet him. 

“Her window is open, she wouldn’t sleep like that,” Dave told us. There were bottles of liquor all over the floor.

“Dave, has she been drinking again?” Aaron asked.

“No, she’s being doing great. Look, this is her 1 year chip, she hasn’t let it go since she got it. The Replicator has her.” We met up with the team in the hall. Dave went up the fire escape to the roof, and Morgan went up the stairs to help him. JJ took one set of stairs, Aaron the other, and Blake and Spencer went to talk to security. 

I went outside, trying to find Strauss. My phone rang, and the caller ID say Erin Strauss. 

“Erin? Where are you?” I asked.

“Not quite. Does that ever get confusing? The Aaron/Erin thing?”

“Where is she?” I demanded.

“Oh, not far. Say, didn’t Aaron receive a phone call like this before? George Foyet, wasn’t it? Only he didn’t make it in time. Neither of you did.”

I ignored the taunt, looking around the streets trying to find her, before hanging up on the unsub. I finally saw her on a bench down the street. I ran as fast as I could to her. 

“Erin, Erin!” I grabbed her, she was wobbling all over the place, very clearly drugged. 

“Y/N?”

“Erin, is he armed? Did you recognize him?”

“My children…he knows where my family is!” She tried to get away from me, but I steadied her and made her sit with me on the bench.

“Erin, did you know him?” She shook her head. 

“Tell my children I love them…”

“They know. Erin, the EMTS are on their way.”

“I don’t wanna die alone.”

“You’re not alone,” I said, holding her to me as much as I could. Her eyes closed, and her breathing slowed. By the time Dave, Morgan, and Aaron arrived, she was dead. 

We picked up Jack, taking him home with us on the jet. He was still mostly asleep, and we wanted to keep him that way. Jessica would meet us at the airstrip and take him home with her. The Replicator had killed one of own, had broken into Penelope’s apartment and hacked her computers. He was too dangerous. 

“He knew about Foyet,” JJ said as we got off the elevator.

“Who’s Foyet?” Blake asked.

“The man who killed my ex-wife,” Aaron replied. I squeezed his hand.

“That’s a classified case, the only people who know about it are on the inside,” Morgan stated.

“Conference room in 5,” Aaron ordered, and we went up to his office. Aaron closed the door behind us. 

“If I asked you to go into hiding, would you?” he asked me. I gave him a look. “I knew the answer, but I had to ask.”

“Aaron, he just killed Strauss. He’s been stalking us for months now. I’m not gonna back out of this, not until we catch him.” I hugged him, taking his hand and placing it on my stomach. “We’re all gonna be okay.”

After Rossi was drugged and taken off to the hospital, Penelope managed to narrow down our list of suspects. In the end, we only had one guy. John Curtis. He worked with Blake and Strauss back in 2001, on the case that ruined Blake’s career. According to her, he fit the profile perfectly. 

We took helicopters to his compound, splitting up midair to land on opposites of the field as a precaution. Aaron, Blake, and Reid went in one helicopter, and I went with JJ and Morgan in the other. We got a distress call from them moments before we landed, and took off again. When we landed, we saw the other helicopter had crashed. 

I rushed out and ran over to it. “Aaron!” I pried the door open, but he was alright. 

“Where’s Blake?” Morgan asked, picking up a canister from the back. “What’s this?”

Curtis had taken Blake, we found her chained up in the basement of the house. Just as Spencer and Aaron were unlocking her, Spence realized something. I could see it in his eyes.

“Guys, this is too easy. In chess, Zugzwang has another meaning, that it’s sometimes better not to move…don’t stand up!” he called to Blake, but it was too late. She had already stood. 

“It’s a pressure plate,” I stated, looking down at it. The door locked behind us, trapping us inside. Luckily, Rossi arrived, letting us out, and we ran like hell. By the time Rossi got out, the building exploded. Curtis had lost. 

We all attended Strauss’s funeral later that week, and held our own private memorial for her at Rossi’s house. We drank wine – I drank water – and toasted to our lost friend and colleague. As much as Strauss was a pain in our ass, she had grown on me over the years. I would miss her.

“Last year, in this very spot, we celebrated something a little different,” Rossi pointed out. “and hopefully we’ll be celebrating that thing again very soon.” He gave me a direct look, and I shrugged.

“Well…we did decide we might need to move the wedding up, what with the two little food stealing monsters taking over my body,” I replied, and everyone laughed. 

“Just tell me when, bella, and I’ll have everything ready.”

We were married at the end of June, in Rossi’s backyard, just as JJ and Will had been. Originally we had meant to have a bigger wedding, but after the pain and suffering the team had dealt with the last year, I felt like it needed to be more intimate. My parents came of course, and Sean sent his congratulations as he couldn’t attend, for obvious reasons like being in prison. He’d be out in a couple years, sooner with good behaviour, which I made him promise to uphold on pain on getting his ass kicked by me. 

Spencer was my man of honour, as requested, and Dave was Aaron’s best man. Penelope demanded to be the flower girl since we’d shrunk our wedding party, and Jack carried our rings. Luckily I hadn’t picked a wedding dress before the pregnancy, so I was able to find one that fit my belly and still made me feel like a princess.

“Sure you really wanna do this?” I asked Aaron, whispering to him as we stood at the altar. 

“I’ve never been more sure of something in my life,” he replied.

We said our ‘I do’s, and he kissed his bride. It felt like a happy ending to a horrible year, being able to finally marry the love of my life. Exciting days lay ahead, with the twins due in November. Aaron and I were looking for a new house for our expanding family. Morgan promised to make the twins bedroom the “hippest room in the house”. 

As I danced with my friends – my family – I thought about what my future looked like. Would I return to the BAU after my maternity leave? Would I want to? I wasn’t sure. But I had time. 

“What are you thinking about, Mrs. Hotchner?” Aaron asked, pulling me out of my thoughts.

“Hm…just how lucky I am. To have you, and Jack, and the twins, and the team. I never thought I’d get all this, back when I joined the BAU.”

“I never really expected it either,” he joked. He’d still been married to Haley when I’d joined 6 years previously. 

“You know, Gideon said something to me before he left. I’d forgotten about it until now.”

“What was that?”

“He told me to wear my blue dress to work more often. I didn’t even think about it.”

“Which blue dress?” Aaron asked, confused.

“The one I wore that day. The day you realized you were attracted to me. The short one…”

“Gideon told you to where that more…”

“I think Jason was a particularly good profiler,” I laughed, kissing my husband.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I struggled with how I wanted to incorporate the pregnancy, and based on events in season 9 I decided that now was a good point to do so. I also wanted this chapter to begin and end on a good note, since the team as a whole had a rough season 8 haha.
> 
> There will be more chapters as I continue to finish the show! But it's gonna take some time to watch and write while I work and do schoolwork! Thank you all for the amount of love I've been getting with this series!!


	9. Route 66

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader continues through her pregnancy, until a sudden medical emergency changes the Hotchners lives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> again, thank you all for your continued support. There's still more of this story to tell, so there will be more chapters coming!

“Sorry you guys had to come back so soon,” Aaron said to the team once we were all in the conference room. 

“Well, it’s about the only time I get to see my husband, so I’m all for it,” I teased. He just sighed and told Garcia to get on with the briefing. We were on the jet to Arizona within 45 minutes, looking for an unsub who raped two women, then shot them in the heart and forced them into prayer position.

“K, out with it,” Morgan said to me as we were walking the latest crime scene.

“Out with what?” I asked, sneaking a chocolate bar. Aaron was trying to keep me away from the junk food.

“Hotch’s been pulling double duty since Strauss died. They have to replace her eventually.”

“Yes, they do.”

“Is Hotch taking that job?”

“No idea.”

“Y/N, he’s your husband, you can’t tell me you don’t know.”

“I can tell you that, and I will. If Aaron’s been offered the position, you should ask him.” I munched my chocolate bar and smiled at Derek. “Sorry, man.”

“You are Hotch were made for each other, neither of you give anything away.”

I just laughed, finishing my chocolate bar and walking over to the body. 

“Could you do it?” Spencer asked me suddenly, as we watched Aaron interrogating Carla Hines. 

“Do what?”

“Give up one of the twins.”

“No, never. Not even if I was in her situation. I get it must have been hard, being a single mother with twins. I’m lucky, I have Aaron and Jack, but…no. I love these kids more than anything. If Aaron wasn’t in the picture anymore, it wouldn’t change my love for them.”

Spencer nodded, and I just then I felt a kick on the left side of my stomach. 

“Ooo…Baby A is kicking, wanna feel?” I asked, and before he could refuse I took his hand and put it on my stomach.

“JJ made me feel Henry kicking once…it’s so weird,” he complained.

“Hey, that’s your godchild in there. Don’t call them weird.”

“Do I get to be godfather to both or just one?” Spencer asked.

“Both. We tried to reel Rossi in, but he said he didn’t want responsibility over a child in his ripe age,” I said, laughing. 

“Wow, I’ve got 3 godchildren…”

“And eventually you’ll have your own children too. Lots of responsibility Dr. Reid.”

Spencer just shrugged, taking his hand back. 

“You’ll find your person, Spence. Someday.”

“What if Maeve was my person, and now I’ve lost my chance?” he asked quietly.

“I don’t believe that. I think we get lots of potential “person”s, Maeve was one of yours, but it wasn’t the right circumstance. You’ll find another. Aaron did, after Haley.”

“What do you think would have happened with you guys if Hotch and Haley hadn’t split up?”

“I dunno…I guess I’d have found a different person,” I said, holding my belly, “but I’m glad I found Aaron.”

“Me too. You guys are great together, and the twins are gonna have the best parents ever.”

I still had clearance to fly, despite being 7 months pregnant, so I went with the team to Dallas as we investigated a mass sniper shooting. I had to stay in the FBI building, but I was allowed to manage the team and give directions. I was basically doing Aaron’s job for him since I could no longer do my own. 

“I wish I could have seen his face when you two were holding hands,” I said to JJ and Morgan. They had just come back from interviewing The General, a South Aryan member whose claims of turning over a new leaf turned out to be bogus.

“He was so mad,” JJ confirmed, “especially when Morgan grabbed his hands. Thought he was gonna try and jump him right there.”

“I bet he would have if he’d been able to,” I laughed. 

“I can only imagine how he would have reacted if you’d been in there, Y/N. Thinking about little Morgan and Y/L/N babies would have made him lose his mind,” JJ wondered, and Morgan came over.

“We’d make beautiful little babies, Y/N,” he joked.

“Aw, we would have, such a shame.”

Aaron walked in just then, giving us a look. “If the twins are born looking anything like you Morgan, I will hunt you down.” We all laughed then, and I went over to give my husband a kiss hello.

“Don’t worry, baby. These kids are gonna come out with perfect hair and a frown, just like their daddy.”

The team were able to locate where Maya Carcani was hiding out, and they went there to save her and stop the sniper. I had to wait at the field office, keeping my phone nearby for when they called to update me. JJ called and told me Maya was safe, and explained how Aaron had taken out the sniper. I waited for the team to get back, visions of what Aaron did floating through my mind. 

As soon as Aaron was done talking with the other agents, I gestured for him to follow me into an empty back room. He did, and closed the door behind him. I immediately jumped him, kissing him passionately, hands on his face holding him to me.

“mmm…what’s this about?” He asked, when he could get his lips away from mine.

“JJ told me what you did…you sniped the sniper through a set of blinds.”

“Yes…and?”

“That’s the hottest thing I’ve ever heard,” I told him, kissing him again. 

“Baby, we aren’t having sex in the Dallas Field office.”

“Why not? We can be fast,” I said suggestively, taking his hands and putting them on my breasts. They had grown during pregnancy, and I knew he enjoyed them. 

“Because it’s a sure fire way to get both of us fired and removed from the FBI entirely. Come on, we gotta go to the hotel and get checked out.”

“Can we have sex at the hotel?” 

“Y/N…”

“I’m pregnant and horny, Aaron. Give me a break.”

We got back to the hotel room, and Aaron went to take a shower. I’d had one in the morning, and spent my day inside so I didn’t need another. I got changed and put on an oversized t-shirt before climbing into bed. Despite my lack of activity, I was exhausted from growing two tiny little people inside me. I was still awake when Aaron got out, wearing only his boxers, and got into bed beside me, having turned the lights off. 

He moved behind me, being the big spoon, wrapping an arm around my belly. 

“Well, are you still horny?” he whispered to me, and I nodded. 

“I’m always horny lately.”

His hand moved down and pulled my t-shirt up, giving him access to my clit. He rubbed it gently, my legs falling open as he did. I ground my ass against his growing erection, working him up the same way he was working me. Aaron pushed my upper leg forward towards my chest, giving him better access to my entrance.

I felt him adjusting his boxers, then slipping his cock inside me. I moaned at the intrusion. 

“Tell me how you did it,” I ordered him, and he seemed confused at first, before understanding my meaning. He pumped into me from behind, gently. 

“I was in Maya’s apartment, set up in her open balcony door. I knew which room the sniper was in, so I took aim. I saw the glint of his scope, and fired.”

“I dunno if it’s my maternal instincts reacting, or if I’m just really into it, but I swear you taking out a sniper is the sexiest thing ever.”

Aaron laughed gently, kissing my neck. He continued to rub my clit softly, not enough to really get me worked up. He wanted to savour it. “I think it’s just you, sweetheart.”

“Mm…Aaron?”

“Yes?”

“You’re gonna need to fuck me a little harder than that.”

He smacked my ass, and I groaned, feeling myself get wetter. 

“Thought you knew better than to give me orders, Agent,” he scolded me, biting my neck lightly.

“Sorry, sir. It won’t happen again.”

He slapped my ass again, before thrusting into me deeply. “Better not.” But he did as I asked, and begin rubbing my clit faster, pumping into me harder and deeper than before. One hand went up my shirt and grabbed my breast, tweaking the nipple to hardness and pulling on it. 

“Fuck…Aaron…”

“You close, sweetheart?” He asked, and I nodded. He rubbed me faster, making sure to angle his cock to hit my g-spot and making me moan loudly. Within a minute I came on his cock, crying out and biting the pillow under my head. He grabbed my hips, pulling me against him and pumping into me quickly, reaching his own climax and cuming inside me. He pulled out gently, grabbing a Kleenex to wipe us off. 

“Better now?” he asked.

“For now…” I yawned, closing my eyes. I heard him chuckle behind me, cuddling up against my back. 

“We can get started,” Aaron told Garcia, and she began to explain the case. We had a missing girl in Kansas, abducted by her ex-con father. 

“She’s been missing 5 hours now, we know how time sensitive these…cases are…” Aaron was struggling to get the words out. “Excuse me..” he went to walk away and I watched him collapse, falling to the floor of the conference room. 

“Aaron!” I shouted, pushing myself to try and stand. I was 8 months pregnant with twins, getting up wasn’t easy. Rossi and Morgan got up and ran to him. He had fallen onto his back, and his breathing was incredibly laboured. 

Penelope was already calling 911. Spence came over to me and made me stay seated.

“He’s okay, y/n, he’s gonna be okay,” he comforted me. But it was too late. The stress of watching my fiancé pass out in front of me had caused my water to break.

“Penelope, get another ambulance here,” I groaned, holding my stomach. She immediately yelled into her phone that they needed to send two ambulances STAT.

Blake went to grab me a glass of water. When the emts arrived I made them take Aaron first, asking which hospital he was going to. It was the hospital from my birth plan, the closest to FBI headquarters. 

They had Aaron on the stretcher with an oxygen mask on by the time my emts arrived, helping me out of the conference room and down the elevator. I made them swear to take me to the same hospital, and made Penelope come with me, sending Rossi with Aaron. The rest of the team were concerned, but we had a case. Rossi told them to go without us, we’d keep them updated. 

They wheeled me in behind Aaron, who they rushed into an OR. 

“Dave, keep me updated,” I demanded, and he nodded, kissing my head. 

“You too, bella.” 

He waited outside the no entry doors, while Penelope and I went to get me into a room. 

“Penny, what happens if Aaron-“

“Don’t. Do not. Hotch will be fine, and you will be fine, and by tomorrow you’ll have two bouncing beautiful babies to show him.”

“He didn’t want to miss the delivery...”

“It’s gonna be fine, y/n,” she said, squeezing my hand. 

“What about the team? If you’re here who’s helping them?”

“I already texted Kevin, told him he has full use of my office but not to mess anything up. Don’t worry about them, they know what they’re doing.”  
I nodded, and a nurse came over to get me into my room. Penelope helped me get undressed and into my hospital gown. Then I sat on the bed while they took my blood pressure. 

“How are your contractions?” The nurse asked.

“Um, like 5 seconds, every 25 mins.”

“Still early then, you’re gonna be hanging around for a while, momma.” 

I nodded, “Sorry, my fiancé is in surgery, my friend is waiting for him, can you make sure he knows what room I’m in?”

“What’s your fiancés name?”

“Aaron Hotchner and my friend is David Rossi.”

“I’ll find Mr. Rossi and let him know.” I thanked her as she left, and stood up, walking around the room. 

It had been two hours, since Aaron collapsed. Rossi had called Penelope and she put him on speaker phone. Aaron was bleeding internally, the likely cause being the scar tissue from when Foyet stabbed him. They needed to do an exploratory surgery to find the source of the bleeding. Rossi needed to go join the team in Kansas. That left Penelope to deal with me and Aaron. My contractions were now lasting 10 seconds and every 15 mins. Time was running out. 

“Penelope...” I groaned, now sitting on the bed breathing through a contraction.

“It’s okay sweetie, I’m here.”

I looked up at the ceiling.

“Haley Brooks, you do not get to have him back yet. We still need him here.” I had already called Jessica and told her what was happening, what I knew anyway, and she was keeping Jack busy. 

“Ughhhhhh.” 

Penelope came over and grabbed a cup of water with a straw, getting me to drink some. 

“Can you check on Aaron?”

“I very sternly told at least ten nurses that they are to come here immediately if there is any news at all about Hotch. He’s in surgery. Right now the best thing you can do is get those babies out.”

Hotch POV

Rossi dropped me off in front of a movie theatre. I knew it wasn’t real. I walked inside, following a red balloon to the open doors of an auditorium. A singular person sat near the front, staring at the blank screen. As I walked down, I realized who it was.

“Hey, there you are. The show’s just about to start, I saved you a seat,” Haley told me, and I walked down the aisle to her.

“You look so beautiful.”

“Aw, thanks sugar.”

“I miss you, so much.” 

“I know. Oh look, Jack looks so proud of you crossing the finish line. Ooh, who’s that?” I looked over at the screen. It was playing my memories, the triathlon. The day I proposed to Y/N.

“Y/N.”

“She’s gorgeous, and she’s so great with Jack.”

“She’s not his mother, and I…I’m not enough for him sometimes.”

“Oh stop, you’re great. Jack loves her. Oh look, you proposed. Didn’t even have the ring on you. But I do love how you got Jack involved.”

“Haley…”

“Shh…go Jack, go! GOAL!” Haley clapped, watching our son score his first goal in soccer. 

“Jack misses you so much.”

“Well, maybe you should talk about me more. Oh, look at her belly. You guys are having twins, how exciting.”

Just then a man came into the aisle, squeezing past us and sitting down on Haley’s other side. He pulled his hood back. It was Foyet.

“What’s he doing here?”

“I invited him,” Haley told me. 

“Oh, look at her she’s a pretty one, I could just tear into her,” Foyet taunted, watching Y/N on the screen. He took out a gun and shot Haley in the stomach. I took off my jacket, trying to stop the bleeding.

“Haley, I can’t stop the bleeding.”

“You’re not supposed to, silly.”

“Yeah, you’re not supposed to. Now can we get back to the show? Popcorn?” Foyet held the bucket of popcorn out to me.

“No.”

He offered it to Haley, who gladly took some. I continued to try and stop the bleeding. Eventually the film ended, on a shot of Y/N smiling, holding her belly, with Jack beside her. 

“Aw, that was great,” Haley said, “Ok, time to go.” The blood disappeared, and her wound was gone.

“I gotta take a leak, meet you guys in the lobby,” Foyet said, patting my shoulder and leaving.

“Well that was fun,” Haley said as we entered the lobby.

“I don’t want you to go.”

“What about Jack? and Y/N? and the twins? They need you now more than ever.”

“Just a little while longer?”

“No time,” she said with a laugh.

“Please?”

“You have to go back now. I know you’re the big boss man, but you can’t always get your way. Happiness is a choice, so choose.”

“I don’t know how. How, how do I choose?” She had walked outside, where Rossi stood waiting for me, dressed like a chauffeur. 

“Get out of your head, the heart is the one that knows, follow it.”

Rossi smiled, waiting for me to finish.

“Y/N’s a keeper, and Jack really loves her. So don’t you screw it up,” Haley ordered me, walking over and kissing me goodbye. 

“Goodbye, Aaron.” She walked off, fading into the distance. Rossi held my door open for me, and I climbed inside. We drove away, and I knew I was going home, back to Y/N.

Reader POV

“10 centimetres, okay momma it’s time,” the nurse said, sending another nurse to grab my doctor. Penelope stood by my head, holding my hand. 

“I don’t know if I can do this without Aaron.”

“Yes you can, cause you are a strong, crazy fierce lioness mom. You can do it,” she encouraged me. 

By the time the doctor came in I had been pushing for a couple minutes. She took a look, and said everything looked great.

“Babies are in the correct position, should be able to push them right out no problem.”

I didn’t take an epidural, even though I originally planned to. I wanted to be completely aware, in case something happened to Aaron. As I pushed, I imagined him flatlining on the table, Penelope having to tell me my children would never meet their father. I started to cry, but I was in intense pain, so no one could guess the truth. 

“Alright, I see a head, give me another big push, ok, now.”

I pushed hard, and felt the head release, a second before the crying began. 

Penelope was crying too, out of joy and excitement. 

“Ok gimme another push, push push push.” I pushed again, and the rest of the body came out. 

“It’s a boy!” The doctor called out, cutting the umbilical cord and handing him off to a nurse. 

“Alright, let’s get baby number 2 out of there. Keep pushing.”

I pushed and pushed, and heard the cries of my second child, a girl. They let me take a break once they were both out before delivering the placenta.

Penelope’s phone rang and she kissed my forehead before running out to answer it. She came back in almost immediately.

“Hotch is okay, he’s out of surgery!” She exclaimed.

“Oh thank god...” I groaned, getting ready to push again. Once I was done, they placed my babies in my arms, all cleaned up and new. 

“Hey kiddos...you picked a real bad time to come out,” I scolded them. 

After a few hours I was moved to a new room to stay with the twins until we were allowed to leave. I sent Penelope to go check on Aaron and find out where he was. He had to stay on a different floor, but I made them let me go see him. Penelope stayed with the twins.

Aaron wasn’t awake, but I sat in the chair next to him, my own IV still attached to keep me hydrated. He woke up within an hour, looking over at me. 

“Y/N…what happened?”

“You collapsed, complications from the stabbing. They almost lost you during the surgery, but you’re okay now.” He looked at my IV, and my dressing gown, and tried to sit up, panicked.

“The twins, are they, are you?”

“Aaron, it’s okay. I went into early labour. We’re all fine.”

“I missed it...”

“You had a pretty good excuse.” I stood up and kissed him lightly.

“Where’s Jack?”

“With Jessica, they’re on their way. Jack’s excited to meet his new brother and sister.”

“Did you name them?” He asked, and I shook my head. 

“Not without you. I’ll bring them down later. Right now it’s mommy and daddy time. Don’t want them to see me yell at you so soon.”

“Y/N…”

“You almost left me. Left us. You don’t get to do that, not yet,” I told him, tears in my eyes. “I thought I was gonna have the twins and be told you’d died on the table.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, you better be.” I kissed his hand, holding it in mine as I sat back down, not wanting my nurse to come in and yell at me. 

Jack and Jessica came to visit Aaron, Jack jumping up on the bed and hugging his father. He came around and hugged me too, and I gave him a kiss on the forehead.

“We brought balloons, it was an interesting trip to the store, asking for congratulations and baby balloons and get well soon balloons,” Jessica said, putting Aaron’s balloons near his bed and keeping mine by the door.

“Thank you Jess, have you seen the twins yet?”

“No, Jack wanted to see his dad first.”

We got the all clear for the twins to come down, and Penelope made it her mission to guard them with her life as the nurses pushed them in their hospital cribs. When they came into Aaron’s   
room his face lit up, as if he hadn’t just had major life saving surgery.

I went over and picked up the baby closest to me, our son, and brought him over for Aaron to hold. Penelope picked up our daughter, bringing her to me to hold. 

“Aaron, meet your children. Jack, this is your brother and sister.”

Jack was ecstatic, brushing his fingers lightly over his brother’s tiny hand. “They’re so small.”

“Well, twins are usually tinier, and they did come a month early. But they’ll grow,” I explained, and he nodded. 

“What’s their names?” he asked, and I looked at Aaron. We had discussed it earlier, and came to a decision.

“Well, your brother is named Noah David, and your sister is Avery Haley.”

“Mom’s name is Haley,” Jack said, and I nodded. 

“Yup. We named her after your mom.”

Jack leaned in and gave Avery a kiss on the forehead, then Noah. “I’m Jack, I’m your big brother.”

We were all allowed to go home a couple days later, and Jessica was an angel, helping us at the house. Penelope came over as much as she could, as did the team, so I was never in want of a helper, especially since Aaron was still recovering from the surgery. When we got home the first day I found the living room filled with gifts, most from Penelope, but some from the team and family members. 

“Penny, you always go way overboard,” I scolded her, as she helped us home from the hospital.

“Please. I have tiny little baby godchildren who need to be spoiled immediately. Besides, I was calm. This is like half the stuff I wanted to buy. JJ made me relax.”

“Thank god someone did,” I laughed. 

“And Jack, I didn’t forget you, I got you stuff too,” she told him, and went with him to open his gifts. I rolled my eyes, putting the car seat that held Avery down. Jessica had Noah, and she put him down beside his sister. 

“We made sure everything was set up in the nursery for you guys,” she told me, and I hugged her. 

“I don’t know what we’d do without you Jess.”

I was officially on my 3 month maternity leave, while Aaron was off until he got cleared to go back in the field, which would be another week or so. We spent that time getting to know our new children, and making sure Jack didn’t feel left out. Spending time with the kids, and seeing Aaron not in the office made me consider not returning to the BAU. It would certainly be easier to stay home and raise the twins (with Jessica’s help), but part of me also wanted to get back to my job. My job that had so far gotten me kidnapped and tortured, Haley murdered, Aaron viciously attacked and in the hospital multiple times, as well as the deaths of Strauss and Maeve. It was a hard job, and a dangerous one, and part of me wasn’t sure it was right to go back now that I was a mother. But I had time to decide. 

Aaron came over and kissed me, looking down into my eyes. 

“I love you, Y/N Hotchner.”

“I love you, Aaron Hotchner.”


	10. Angels/Demons/Sparrows/Scratch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We see Reader post-delivery, returning to work, the loss of an old friend, and the introduction of a new enemy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter spans a large chunk of the show, from mid season 9 - towards the end of season 10. I felt like there wasn't too much to talk about for them during this period so I bunched it together. No smut this chapter, she did just have twins, but don't worry it will be returning next chapter!

“Spencer, a little birdie told me you delivered a baby today,” I said, watching him blush over the video call. 

“Yeah…I mean we didn’t have time to get her to a hospital.”

“Since when did you know how to do that?” I asked, holding Avery up to my breast. She was an easy latcher, while Noah was a bit more of a pain. Luckily he was asleep. 

“When you told us you were having twins, I researched twin births and I memorized the delivery manual just in case you gave birth in the field. One in every 10 twin births come earlier than 32 weeks, you know.”

“Well, it’s good to know you were prepared.”

“Where’s Noah?” He asked, sipping what I knew was probably a non-alcoholic drink. 

“Sleeping, I’d show you but Avery would get mad at ruining her meal.” Spencer laughed and waved at the camera, though Avery paid him no mind at all. 

“Spence I’m putting you in charge of making sure Aaron comes home at a decent hour, okay? And tell the team I love them.”

“We love you too, all of you!” We hung up, and Avery finished up, beginning to fall asleep. I burped her quickly, letting her pass out on my shoulder before carrying her into the nursery and placing her in her crib. Noah was still sound asleep. I double checked the baby monitors (we had one near both cribs), then went to check on Jack. He was sound asleep as well, holding an army man in his arms. I went into the room, carefully taking the toy from him and putting it on his nightstand, then tucking him in tighter. He made a comforted noise when I gave him a kiss on the forehead, then I went to the living room to enjoy some alone time. 

Aaron arrived home just after midnight, and I was dozing on the couch. He woke me with a kiss, and I grabbed his jacket to kiss him longer before he got away from me.

“I missed you,” he said, smiling down at me. “How are the kids?”

“Missed you too. Surprisingly they all seem to still be asleep,” I said, checking the video monitors for the twins. 

“Well, lucky me. I get to spend some quality time with my wife,” he said as I pulled him down on top of me on the couch. 

I brought the twins in one day when the team was staying in the office. I wanted to surprise them, so I snuck in, which is incredibly hard to do when pushing a double stroller with crying babies in it. 

JJ was the first to see us, and she let out a squeal of joy, coming over and hugging me first. 

“Omg, Y/N, you look amazing, how are you feeling?”

“Better, now that someone isn’t kicking my ribs all day.” It had been about two weeks since the delivery. 

I heard the click of large pumps coming from behind me, and turned to see Penelope rushing over. 

“Omg, omg, where are my godchildren?!” She practically screamed, barely acknowledging me before moving me out of the way to see the twins. 

“Omg, they are so beautiful. You and Hotch make such gorgeous babies.”

“Thank you,” I said, laughing. Rossi came over next, kissing me on both cheeks. 

“How are you, bella?” 

“Tired, very tired.”

“I can’t even imagine, dealing with Henry is a pain sometimes, let alone two at once,” JJ said, letting Noah play with her fingers. Penelope was taking Avery out and cuddling her. 

“Jack and Jessica have been incredibly helpful. It’s nice having an older kid around. He acts just like his father, always fussing over them.”

“It’s so good he adores them,” Penelope said, rocking Avery to sleep.

“He really does.” 

We spent an hour or so at the office, with everyone coming to meet the twins. JJ, Spencer, and Penelope watched them while Aaron and I had a lunch date in his office, which mostly involved me shoving a sandwich down my throat and cuddling on the couch while I took a much needed nap. We had to figure out our new routine, but we’d manage.

I went back to work 6 months after the twins were born, and we had hired a nanny to help Jessica since we had now tripled her work load in terms of watching the kids. I took most of my paperwork home with me so that I could be around the twins as much as possible. Aaron made sure to spend lots of time with Jack, as did I, so he didn’t get jealous, but he was a good kid and he understood that babies needed help. 

My first big case was working with the team in Texas. We had multiple prostitutes that had been murdered. As we worked the case, it became clear there was more going on than we knew. The local priest was involved, we knew, but not alone, and so we had him followed to a local bar. We all showed up, ready to take him in nice and easy, until a gunshot rang out, hitting the sheriff. 

Everything went to shit after that. 

Blake and I were attempting to grab the Sheriff and pull him to safety behind the car door, but bullets were still coming at us. I heard Spencer shout for Blake, coming around the door, only to be shot in the neck and fall on top of me. 

“Spence!” I let go of the sheriff and grabbed Spencer, pulling him around to the back of the cop car. I put pressure on his neck, feeling the blood staining my fingers.

“Spence, honey, you hold on.” He blinked at me, unable to focus on my face. “look at me, baby boy. Eyes on me. I need a medic here, now!” Blake came over, and I could see she was traumatised, though I didn’t know why. She kept calling him Ethan. 

Derek rode with Spencer in the ambulance, since Derek had been shot in the arm, so Blake, JJ, and I drove together to the hospital. I sat in the waiting room with Blake and JJ, waiting for the rest of the team to arrive. Garcia and Cruz showed up, apparently he knew someone with a private plane, and the team went to go talk to Derek. I waited with Blake for Spencer.

“He needs to be okay. He’s too young…” Blake said.

“Spence knows if he died on me, I’d bring him back and kill him myself,” I said, wringing my hands in worry. 

About an hour later the doctor arrived, and Blake and I anxiously turned to him.

“He’s out of surgery now. He’s a lucky guy, 2mm to the left and the bullet would have hit the carotid artery. Instead it hit some minor veins and vessels, we patched him up. You can go see him now.”

“Thank you, doctor,” I said, as he led us to Spencer’s room. We found Garcia on the way and she came with us. Spence wasn’t awake yet, but Garcia started lining up Doctor Who figures on his tray table. 

“He’ll love those,” I said, and she smiled. 

“Okay, well, if he wakes up and all three of us are staring at him he’s gonna be weirded out, so I’m gonna go over here,” Garcia said, walking over to stare out the window. 

“Y/N, you staying with him?” Blake asked, and I nodded. 

“Yeah, go help the team,” I told her. She kissed Spence on the forehead and headed out. 

Spence woke up a little later, and I smiled at him. 

“Hey baby boy, you’re awake.”

“mmm…everyone okay?” he mumbled, and I nodded.

“Everyone’s fine. Including you. Even though you tried to die on me.”

“Sorry.” I leaned in and kissed his forehead gently. 

“Just don’t pull that shit again.” I stayed with Spencer for a little while before I had to get back to the team. We didn’t know how many, but we knew most of the police force were corrupt. I left Garcia with Spencer to keep an eye on him.

We ended up at a junk yard that Officer Owen McGregor frequented. We knew McGregor had fired that first shot at the bar, and Blake and Rossi were attacked by two other deputies that ended up dead. Aaron and I partnered together, following the sound of soft footsteps around an old junk car. 

Aaron went around one side, I went the other, but he got to Owen first, I heard them fighting. Owen fell backwards in front of me, having been punched by Aaron, but he recovered, smacking me and making me drop my gun, before he tackled Aaron, pushing him onto the hood of a car. I jumped on his back, wrapping my arms around his neck, and he let go of Aaron, running backwards and shoving me into a truck. He got up and rammed Aaron, and they fell to the ground. I pushed myself up and went for my gun, before getting my legs kicked out from under me by Owen. He grabbed my legs and pulled me towards him, but Aaron punched him and he let me go. Owen kicked at Aaron, before running to grab his gun. Aaron got his first, and shot Owen in the heart before he could get a shot off. I pushed myself to my feet, walking over to Aaron as he went to check Owen was dead. 

“You okay, sweetheart?” Aaron asked, and I nodded. He kissed me gently, wrapping his arm around my waist. JJ and Morgan walked over shortly after and confirmed everyone else was dead. 

Blake left the team after the case, deciding to take a teaching job and be with her husband. Aaron interviewed 10 people to replace her, finally landing on Kate Callahan. She was an amazing addition to the team, and I adored working with her. She had great instincts. 

Aaron got the call, I was with Spencer watching the new episode of Doctor Who. He called me, and I couldn’t even find the words to tell Spencer.

“Where?” I asked Aaron, and he told me. “We’ll be there soon.” I hung up, unable to look at Spence.

“What’s up, new case?” He lost his enthusiasm when he saw my face. “What’s wrong? Is everyone okay?”

I shook my head. “Spence…It’s Gideon.”

Spencer wanted to drive, and we pulled up outside Gideon’s cabin. The team were inside, most of them I assumed anyway. I turned to look at Spence as he turned off the ignition.

“Sweetie, you don’t need to go inside.”

“I do.” He got out, and I followed, taking his hand and holding it tightly in mine. We walked inside the open door, where the team minus Garcia and Morgan were standing around a body on the floor, a sheet covering it. I could feel Spencer trembling. I squeezed his hand harder. 

Garcia and Morgan came in behind us, and Garcia stood next to me. 

“Are you sure?” She asked Aaron. We all knew he was, but I understood her question. We needed to hear it.

“It’s Gideon,” Aaron confirmed. Spencer pulled his hand from mine and went outside, and I followed him. 

“Spence,” I called to him as he walked into the woods. He didn’t reply, but I ran to catch up. I got in front of him and stopped him. He kept his head down but I could hear him crying.

“Spence, baby, I’m so sorry,” I hugged him, crying with him. He didn’t speak, but he let me hold him. Eventually I got him to come back and sit in his car while we waited for CSI and the coroner to arrive. They took Gideon away, and Morgan volunteered to go and get the ME report. Spencer didn’t say anything, but he got up and followed Morgan. 

I went inside, staring down at where Gideon drew his final breath. Kate came up behind me. 

“How long had it been?” she asked.

“For the team? Almost 8 years…for me…2.”

“You spoke to him recently?” She asked, surprised.

“I sent him a letter, after the twins were born. He was the one who pushed me to Aaron. I wanted him to know we were happy. And that we missed him.”

“Did he write back?” I nodded.

“He just said thank you. Gideon, he…he needed his space. Always. The best way to love him was from afar.”

Spencer and Morgan came back with the ME report, and Spencer started helping me look through some of Gideon’s things. He found his book, the one he kept of those he couldn’t save. But he started another book. 

“Y/N…” Spence called to me, and I went over. He showed me the book. It held photos of the team, including Emily and Elle, some of the victims he’d saved, his son Steven, and the photo of Aaron and I with the twins and Jack I had sent him. 

“He never forgot us,” I said, hugging Spencer from the side. “We were his success story. All of us.” 

We found the man who killed Jason Gideon, and yet we still felt like we had let him down. After all the years he had been out of the BAU, he still tracked down a murderer, gave us a victim, and yet we couldn’t save Gideon. His death hit Spencer hard, and I spent as much time with him as I could, but I had my own family to take care of. Gideon’s death made me seriously consider leaving the FBI to be home. I knew one day there was a chance that Aaron or I would die on a case, or even both of us, and the thought terrified me. But I decided to stay, for a little while longer.

We had a new case, victims were being forced to murder people they loved in a drug induced delusion. 2 of the victims were able to tell us what they’d seen, and even draw us a picture of a shadow monster. The third was so stuck in her own delusion she couldn’t speak to us. 

Eventually we discovered that they had all lived in the same foster home at one point, and we used to smell of Sage to get the third victim to tell us about Mr. Scratch, the shadow monster that hurt them as children. Really it was the father of the home, and he had a son who’d testified against him as well. All the kids had been coerced by a psychiatrist. Mr. Scratch ended up blowing out our power, making it difficult for Garcia to locate him. 

“Looks like we found Mr. Scratch,” Rossi said, as we looked at the information Garcia had managed to pull up using the very slow hotspot. 

We knew it was the son, found his address, and called Aaron, who was already out. 

“I’m closest, Garcia send me the address.”

“Aaron, be careful,” I warned him.

“I will, sweetheart.”

Hotch POV

I felt immobilised on the study room floor. I heard the team entering, and I told Lewis, Mr. Scratch, that they would kill him. 

“Will they?” He asked, getting up and leaving the room.

I wanted to warn them, but I couldn’t find the words. I heard a gunshot go off, followed by JJ screaming that Reid was down. More gunshots, then Morgan and Y/N called out to me.

“I’m in here. In the study.”

They came in a moment later, Y/N bending down next to me.

“Where is he?” I asked.

“I got him,” Morgan said. But movement behind him caught my eye. Before I could warn him, Lewis shot Morgan in the neck. He went down, blood spraying over my face.

“Y/N-“ I barely managed to call out, before he shot her too, right through her head. She fell down next to me, dead. I cried out. 

But then it went away.

“Now I know what frightens you,” I heard Lewis say to me. I opened my eyes, to see him still sitting across from me. It hadn’t been real. But it felt real. I heard cars pull up outside. The team were really here this time. Or was it an illusion too?

“I have something for you,” Lewis said, handing me a knife. He knelt down behind me as we both watching the front door. “I’m coming in, kill me, before I kill you.”

I struggled, trying to hold on to reality when it refused to hold onto me. 

“My gun, I need my gun.” Lewis threw it on the ground in front of me, and I reached for it. 

“Kill me,” he whispered in my ear, stepping back, away from me. 

Reader POV

“JJ and I will take the back, Rossi, Reid, Y/N take the front,” Morgan directed us.

“Careful where you aim, one of our own is in there,” Rossi warned. We headed to the front, Rossi taking lead, followed by me and then Spencer. Rossi opened the front door, and I could just see Aaron in the room across from us. He was pointing his gun at us, but immediately turned and shot behind him, breaking the glass on the door. 

Spencer went after the unsub, while I went to Aaron, who handed me his gun.

“Take it, take it away from me,” he said, and I did, taking the knife as well. 

Reid came back and said that the unsub was gone. A minute later Morgan came over the coms to say he and JJ had him. 

“Baby, you okay?” I asked Aaron, tenderly touching his forehead where he had been hurt. 

“I’m fine.”

Spencer came back in the room a few minutes later. “He surrendered.”

“He surrendered? That’s not right…”Aaron stood up, and ignored Rossi’s protests about waiting for the ambulance. He went outside, and I followed. Peter Lewis, Mr. Scratch, looked at Aaron as he was being put into the squad car. He tapped his forehead, and smiled the most devious smile I’d ever seen. I wanted to slap it off his face.

Aaron eventually got looked at in the ambulance, though he refused to go to the hospital. I was sitting with him, brushing his hair back, when Rossi came over.

“You need to tell me what happened,” Rossi said.

“Not tonight.”

“Yes tonight, while it’s still fresh.”

“Some of it…doesn’t make sense to me,” Aaron admitted. 

“It doesn’t have to. Tell me what it smelled like, what you saw, start at the beginning, start at the end, I don’t care just start. Aaron.”

Aaron was right, most of his story didn’t make any sense. He told us how he saw us all die, and he gripped my hand tightly as he told us. But he couldn’t remember what else Lewis had done to him. I took him home, the twins and Jack already asleep. I forced him into the shower, washing him up and getting him into bed. I curled up next to him, trying to find him. He was lost in his own head.

“Aaron…baby, come back to me.”

“I’m here…”

“Then stay with me. Don’t let him beat you.”

He nodded, falling asleep. I stared at him for over an hour, wanting to make sure he would sleep soundly. By morning, he pretended like it hadn’t happened. But we both knew it wasn’t over.


	11. A Beautiful Disaster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The team help Derek find the man behind his kidnapping, and deal with his departure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you guys so much for your patience and crazy support for this series! We're just about at the end of this story, but I have others in the works, including a short prequel from when Y/N first joined the BAU and developed her crush on Hotch. 
> 
> please enjoy this long overdue chapter.

Morgan was still recovering from his kidnaping and torture, and finding out Savannah was pregnant. She was almost due, and Penelope and I were planning some gifts for when the baby was born. Then we got the call. Savannah had been shot, and was being rushed into emergency surgery. We called Aaron, who messaged the others. The team rushed to the hospital, and I drove Penelope from her apartment. She dealt with Morgan first, trying to assess his mood. He was obviously pissed, and as we all suspected it was a hit from the same people who kidnaped him. 

Aaron forced Morgan to stay off the case, so he spent his time waiting in the waiting room while we had a conference room set up looking over the security tapes from the hospital. We were getting close to something when Morgan called Penelope’s phone. She sent him a text, he was demanding some answers. I went instead.

“Were you with Garcia?” Morgan asked as I entered the waiting room.

“Yes.”

“And you came instead of her cause you knew I could read her.”

“Yes. I brought you green tea. It’ll help calm your nerves.” I handed him the cup.

“I don’t have nerves, I just wanna know what the hell is going on.”

“I know. I know you do. And you know why I can’t tell you.”

“That’s bullshit, Y/N. If this was Hotch in there, your kids, you wouldn’t be sitting around doing nothing.”

“You aren’t doing nothing. You are keeping your bias out of the case so that we can figure it out. You are waiting here so that when Savannah and the baby come out of surgery, you are the first person who knows, and the first person she sees when she wakes up. Trust me, Derek, I remember this feeling.”

“Right, you’re right, I’m sorry.”

“I know you’re in pain, and you’re scared, and angry, and confused, and probably a thousand other emotions. But we love you, and Savannah, and we are doing everything in our power to find the man who did this. And that’s why I’m letting you decide if I stay here with you or go back and help the team.”

“What do you mean?”

“Do you need me here, or working the case? I know Aaron sidelined you, but I also know I’m the only one who understands what you’re going through right now. As far as I’m concerned, this is your case. You tell me where you need me to be.”

Derek sat, holding the hot cup of tea in his hand. “Do they need you?”

“Not right now.”

“Can you stay then?”

I sat down next to him, taking one of his hands in mine. “I’ll stay.”

Tara came in a little while later, finished donating blood for Savannah. She offered a bottle of apple juice to Morgan, who turned it down. Aaron and Rossi came in a minute later.

“The unsub used a payphone to call Garcia right after Savannah went into surgery,” Aaron said.

“A homeless man,” Derek added, and we all looked at him. “He stood out cause he was wearing a ring…I didn’t focus on it at the time. Chazz Montolo, Giseuppe Montolo’s father. He wants me to feel what he felt. Now I do.”

I held his hand, feeling the rage burning through him. He squeezed so tightly I thought he might break a finger. Aaron just nodded, acknowledging to Derek what we had been keeping from him all night. Hotch, Tara, and Rossi went back to the conference room to continue working the case, and Derek pulled away from me.

“I need to walk,” he said, leaving the room. I sighed, knowing that there was nothing I could do for him. 

He came back a little while later, and I patted the seat next to me. “Come on, come share some of that hot chocolate loving you save for Garcia.”

He smiled a bit, sitting next to me. “How did you do this, Y/N? You were giving birth while Hotch was dying on an operating table.”

“Penelope. She stayed with me the whole time. Kept me updated, kept me focused on the twins. I just…needed to find the strength to keep going. They couldn’t lose both their parents.”

“And when Foyet had Haley and Jack…”

“It was impossible. Knowing that I had to be calm, because Aaron couldn’t be. I know you’re hiding something from us Derek, and I know why. I just wish you would let us help you.”

“I can’t. I can’t let anyone else get hurt.”

Aaron came in then, closing the door behind him.

“The note, what does it mean?”

“I dunno.”

“You’ve split this team, JJ broke orders to tell you about the note, and now you’re withholding information.”

“I didn’t split this team, you did,” Derek countered, his phone buzzing.

“That’s the Dr.” He got up, leaving the room. I glared at Aaron, getting up.

“I was working on getting him to tell me,” I stated, walking over to him.

“I’m sorry. But he knows where Montolo is.”

“And now he won’t tell us.”

We went back to the conference room, and after ten minutes the Dr came looking for Morgan. She said she hadn’t called him, and we got Garcia to pull up the emergency door footage. We saw Morgan rushing out, and Aaron, Rossi, JJ and I went after him. By the time we got to the parking lot, his truck was gone. Aaron called him, asking him to tell us where he was going. 

“I know, that’s why you have to come back here, or tell me where you’re going,” Aaron replied, and I assumed Derek had brought up Foyet.

Derek said something back, and Aaron hung up, frustrated. 

I grabbed my phone quickly, calling him again.

“Y/N, please,” he said as he answered.

“No Derek, don’t do this. Just tell me where you’re going. It’ll just be me, I’ll come with you.”

“I can’t do that Y/N, I’m sorry.”

“Derek,” I began, but was cut off by his phone ending the call. Frustrated tears spilled from my eyes, and we went back upstairs.

“He’s gone,” Aaron told the rest of the team.

“He was heading North, and then he just stopped, why did he stop?” Garcia said, tracking him on her laptop.

“He got rid of his phone.”

“No, no, that man wants to kill him, he’s walking into a trap!” I hugged Penelope from behind. 

“We’ll find him, P.”

We got the address of one of Derek’s rental properties, one with a red door, and immediately everyone piled into the SUV. I stayed behind with Penelope. The Dr came in and told us they’d woken Savannah up, and she wanted her husband.

“I’ll go, stay here.” I got up and went to Savannah’s room.

“They have to do a c-section, where is Derek?” she asked me when I walked in, and I could hear the fear in her voice. I felt that same fear when I delivered the twins.

“We had a break in the case, Derek’s with the team. I know he wants to be here.”

“Then tell him to get back here, now.” They wheeled her out of the room to prepare her for the c-section. I went into the hall, and Penelope was walking towards me on the phone.

“It’s Derek,” she said to me. She called Aaron and then put her phone on speaker, so that we were all together.

“You guys there?” Derek asked.

“We’re here,” Aaron replied.

“Derek, Savannah needs you.”

“I know. But I made this choice, this is my fault, no one else’s. You hear me?” He said, and we heard the sound of a gun cocking. “He’s got a gun to my head, and two bullets.”

Penelope gasped, and I grabbed her free hand. 

“You take care of Savannah, and my baby. Promise me.”

“I will, and you will too Derek,” Penelope replied. Then we heard a gunshot. “Derek?”

“Aaron, tell me you’re there,” I begged.

“1 minute away,” he replied, and hung up. Penelope was crying, and I hugged her.

“He’s okay, he’s gonna be okay.”

And he was okay. Derek made it back to see Savannah give birth to their beautiful baby boy. But with the beginning of his new family, Derek had to say goodbye to his old one. He came into the office a couple days later to gather his things. Penelope was packing up his office for him, and I waited in the hall to intercept him. 

“Hey mama,” he said, coming over to me.

“Hey yourself, daddy. How’s the new best looking Morgan?”

Derek put a hand on his heart as if I had wounded him. “He’s doing so good, they’re gonna let him out of the hospital soon.” 

I smiled. “So you gonna tell me his name or what?”

“Hank Spencer Morgan.” I could feel the tears well in my eyes. “I already told the kid.”

I nodded. “It’s gonna be weird not having you around here.”

“I know. But it’s what I want to do, for my family.”

“You totally coped my move, you know. I was gonna leave and be with my family, but now they’ll just think I’m copying you.”

“You? Leave the BAU? Not a chance,” he said, taking my hand. 

“You let me know how it is on the outside.”

“I will. I’m gonna miss seeing you every day, mama.”

“Me too.” I was crying then, and Derek pulled me into a hug. “I love you, Derek Morgan.”

“I love you, Y/N Hotchner.”

Spencer was sad after Derek left, so I invited him out for ice cream with the kids. Aaron had to work, so Spence and I took Jack and the Twins out to the park. Avery was riding on Spencer’s shoulders, while he held Noah’s hand. I had Noah’s other hand, and Jack was walking next to me on the other side.

“What kind of ice cream you getting?” Spencer asked the kids.

“Chocolate!” the Twins yelled in unison.

“Cookie dough,” Jack answered.

“I might go for some mint chocolate chip,” I replied. Spence rolled his eyes at me. “Oh yeah? What are you gonna get, vanilla?”

“Obviously, the superior ice cream.”

“Boo!” Avery said, smacking Spencer’s head.

“Hey, no hitting young lady!”

“Sorry mommy,” Avery replied, kissing his head better. 

Once we got our ice creams, the kids sat down at a picnic table, making a giant mess. Spencer and I sat across from them, but they quickly finished before we did and went off to play on the jungle gym. 

“It’s weird, with Derek not around. He was here before I joined, seems weird working without him,” I said, licking up some of the melted ice cream that had slid down my hand.

“Yeah…”

“Whatcha thinkin’ about baby boy?”

“Who’s gonna be next? You and Hotch? JJ? You guys have kids, what if you decide Derek is right and the job isn’t worth it?” He asked sadly, his ice cream forgotten.

“Spence…”

“It’s possible. I mean you have 3 kids now, what if you want more? JJ and Will both work different jobs so they hardly see each other. Eventually, you guys are gonna leave too.”

“Even if we do decide that, because yes, someday we’ll all leave, it won’t ever be because of you. You know no one has left because of you, right?”

“Feels that way…Gideon left, Emily and JJ were gone, Alex and Kate, now Derek.”

“That’s just how life is, kid. Now, finish that ice cream before Avery or Noah decide vanilla isn’t so bad.” I curled up into his side, and he put his free arm around me, licking at his melting ice cream. We watched the kids playing until it got dark, then we dropped Spencer off at his apartment.

“Hey Spence…just remember, we’re all still family. No matter what.”

“Bye Uncle Spencer!” Noah and Avery said together. Jack waved, more focused on the new comic book Henry let him borrow. 

Spencer leaned in and kissed my cheek, before heading up to his place. After we got home and the twins were sound asleep, I curled up on the couch next to Aaron. He sensed my mood instantly.

“What’s wrong?”

“Spence feels abandoned…like everyone he ever loved has left him…how do I tell him I want to do exactly what he’s afraid of?”

“Just because you’ll be leaving the BAU doesn’t mean you won’t see him anymore. He is the godfather of our children, remember?”

“I know…but the BAU is our home, and it’ll be different not seeing him every day. I just don’t want to leave so soon after Derek. He needs more time. I need more time.”

Aaron kissed the top of my head. “Whatever you need, baby.”


	12. The Crimson King

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Y/N and Aaron deal with the return of Mr. Scratch and make an impossible choice for their family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end of the main story line, though I plan on adding an epilogue soon. Thank you all again for the love and support for this series, and I hope you join me on more journeys!

Stacey had the day off for appointments, so Aaron and I were taking Jack and Henry to school and JJ to work, while Will was gonna take the twins and Michael to daycare on his way to work. 

It was a hectic morning, with me trying to get the twins ready, and Aaron getting Jack ready. The doorbell rang, and Aaron went to grab it. Will, JJ, and the boys were there.

“Ok, Avery, Noah, let’s go, Uncle Will is here,” I told them, grabbing their bags. I gave Will a kiss on the cheek, and one for Michael. “Be good today, Stacey will pick you up from the daycare!”

Avery and Noah both gave me a kiss before leaving with Will and Michael. JJ and Henry were inside talking to Jack and Aaron. The boys were discussing a new comic book that was coming out today. I heard Aaron opening the gun safe, and went over to grab mine as he handed it to me. We were both clipping them into our holsters when the door burst open and a SWAT team entered. Aaron and I both pulled our guns, while JJ grabbed the boys to her. 

“I’m on the job, I’m FBI Agent Aaron Hotchner,” Aaron said.

“We know who you are, put down your weapons,” the SWAT leader commanded.

“Dad?” I heard Jack call out.

“This is a big mistake,” I said, lowering my weapon. 

“I’m afraid it’s not,” he said, coming over as Aaron put his gun on the table.

“Is this really necessary?” Aaron asked as they handcuffed him with a zip tie bracelet.

“Where are you taking my husband?” I demanded. No one responded to me, dragging Aaron out. I followed them to the street as they loaded him in a van. JJ and the boys came down after me.

We went to the BAU, the only place we could think of. JJ had called Will and he turned around, joining us there with the three youngest. 

“Hey Henry,” Reid said as we entered.

“Hi Uncle Spencer.” Spencer hugged him, before asking Jack about the magic trick he’d taught him.

“Can I go to dad’s office?” He asked me sadly, and I nodded. 

“Let’s all go,” Will said, holding Michael and walking with the kids to Aaron’s office.

“What the hell happened?” Dave asked me.

“I don’t know, they wouldn’t tell me anything.”

“Maybe he was swatted? It’s a prank gamers do,” Penelope suggested.

“They wouldn’t have arrested him if it was a prank,” Reid replied.

“I just got word, he’s downtown,” Rossi said, and I told him I was going with him.

When we got there, we saw two men escorting Aaron into a black SUV. Rossi stopped the car and we jumped out.

“Aaron!”

“Sweetheart, it’s okay,” he said as they put him in the back.

“That’s the Unit Chief of the BAU, where are you taking him?” Rossi asked, but they ignored us and got in. The logo on the side said they worked for the Department of Justice.

“Dave, why is the DOJ arresting my husband?” I asked him, and he hugged me to his side. 

“We’re gonna find out.”

JJ wanted to confront Antonia, but I told her no. I went in, holding a small folder, all the information we had on Antonia’s son, which wasn’t much. After visiting her a couple weeks ago in prison, and hearing her cryptic warning to Aaron, it was important to talk to her.

“You wouldn’t have told Hotch about the Storm unless there was something in it for you. Like maybe that your son is the one behind it.”

“Maybe,” she replied.

“He framed a federal agent and tricked the SWAT team. Thing about them, they don’t like being tricked, so now he’s on a shoot first, ask questions later list.”

“I want him brought into custody alive.”

“I can’t guarantee that, unless you tell me who and where he is, then maybe I’ll consider finding him before they do.”

“You wouldn’t let them hurt him, you swore an oath.”

“I did. And if you’d asked me yesterday I would have guaranteed he’d be safe. But this morning your son sent a group of armed men into my house and arrested my husband in front of our son.”

She looked up at that. “You and Agent Hotchner are married? That explains everything.”

“Yes. I lied to you in the prison. Now tell me where your son is.”

Antonia gave me a searching look, before finally telling me what I wanted to know. I walked back out to see Dave standing with JJ waiting for me.

“Dave, go with Spencer and SWAT, I’m gonna head to the DOJ building and try and talk to Aaron. At least find out what the hell is going on that they think he did.”

I convinced them to let me watch the interrogation from behind the two way mirror. Aaron held his own, as I knew he would, but I desperately wanted to run in there and defend him. He questioned who tipped them off, and they showed a video of Peter Lewis, Mr. Scratch, talking about the incident with the drugging. 

“Why would you ever believe him?” Aaron asked, pausing the video after Lewis claimed to be frightened of Aaron, of what he would do to the team, and to me and the kids.

“We didn’t. But then we looked into it. You’ve been breaking protocol ever since your first wife was murdered. Allowing David Rossi to get away with killing a suspect when you dismissed Agent Elle Greenaway for the same thing 10 years ago. And you failed to include your drugging in your psych evaluations since the incident. Why?”

“Because I knew that someone at the DOJ would use it against me. Seems like I was right.”

“Let me read you something,” he said, opening a folder and reading off word for word what I knew was the profile Aaron had created of a work-place shooter. “Fits you quite well, wouldn’t you say?”

“’Today is the day everything changes’. You really think I woke up today deciding to kill my team, orphan my children, but call and let you know about it beforehand? Calling in a warning doesn’t fit a work-place shooter.”

“I wanna believe you, Agent. But I don’t.”

“This is ridiculous. You have a serial killer with a psychopathic mind telling you he’s afraid of my husband, and suddenly you think he’s gonna blow us all up?” I asked incredulously to the officer next to me. 

“Ma’am, you have a bias in this situation.”

“No shit I do. But I have known Aaron Hotchner for 10 years. I have been married to him for the last 4. I was there when Haley Brooks was murdered, I was there when Jason Gideon was murdered, and I was there when Peter Lewis tried to trick my husband into shooting me as I walked in the door to save him. Never once have I ever been worried or afraid of him. And neither has anyone on our team. He is being framed, and right now the best people to find out why are the BAU, and you have our leader in cuffs.”

Just then my phone rang, and I stepped away to answer it. “Dave, what do we know?”

“Eric Rawden, Hotch put him away a couple years ago. He’s planning a prison break.”

“I’ll meet you there.” I hung up, turning back to see Aaron and the DOJ officer discussing Rawden themselves. Aaron convinced him he wasn’t the threat. He was uncuffing him and getting ready to release him. I ran in, ignoring the shouts at me, and hugged him immediately.

“Y/N? What are you doing here?” He asked, hugging me back.

“I had to make sure someone was here to cover your ass if you started talking smack,” I whispered to him, kissing him. 

“We have to go,” he said, and I nodded. 

By the time we arrived at the prison with more SWAT officers, everyone else was inside. As we entered, heading towards Block A, we saw Tara being surrounded by inmates. Hotch fired off a shot at one that came at us, while I took down another. We found Rawden, and found the location of the bomb. Aaron fired the shot that took out the helicopter and blew it up. When we got back to the office, Will had Michael in his stroller asleep, with Avery sleeping in his arms, and Noah curled up on the floor.

“He chose that, I swear,” Will explained. 

“Where are the boys?” JJ asked, and Will pointed to Aaron’s office. JJ and Aaron went to get them, while I pick up Noah off the floor and cuddled him to me.

“Everything okay now?” Will asked me. 

“I hope so.”

JJ carried Henry down on her back, but I could tell something was up with Jack. Aaron took Avery from Will, and we all went home. Dave invited us all to meet Hayden, ex-wife number 2 and mother of his daughter Joy, so the next night we went over with the kids and the team. 

Spencer was showing a magic trick to Henry, Jack, and Penelope, who seemed more excited than the boys. Avery and Noah were running around playing tag with Will. Aaron and I were watching over. 

“He’s never gonna forget seeing me at gunpoint,” Aaron said, and I nodded. 

“I know. We can’t shelter him from the world forever. But you’re his hero, Aaron. He’ll be alright.”

“He’s getting older, soon he’s gonna hate our guts.”

“Probably, but that’s what we have two more for,” I joked. He kissed me deeply.

“I have a feeling you would have torn down the entire DOJ to get me out of there, if necessary.”

“Damn straight.” I kissed him again, pushing my tongue into his mouth. I heard Noah scream ‘ew!’ and stopped, pulling away to chase after our younger son. 

We sat down for drinks and dinner, putting the younger kids inside Rossi’s mansion to sleep, while Henry and Jack kept themselves entertained. Aaron’s phone went off the same time that Garcia’s did, so we all got up and went inside.

“3 more prison breaks have occurred, all organized by Rawden’s men. They stopped the bombs, but they couldn’t capture all the prisoners in time,” Aaron explained.

“How many got out?” Tara asked.

“13, all serial killers.”

“Including Peter Lewis,” Garcia said. I grabbed Aaron’s hand, needing his presence to reassure me.

“That’s why he testified against you, he was part of the plan all along,” Spencer said.

“We have to catch him again, and 12 other murderers.”

We called Stacey and asked her to come for an overnight. Will took their boys home, while I dropped the kids off at our house. Jack was off, so I grabbed him quickly before he went inside.

“Jack, baby. I need you to talk to me before I go.”

“About what?”

“You must have been scared, when the SWAT team came and took dad away.”

“Yeah…”

“You know it’s different, than what happened to your mom, right?”

Jack nodded, not looking at me.

“I wouldn’t have let anything happen to him, sweetie.”

“I know. But what if they took you too.”

I hugged him. “Baby, they aren’t gonna take us away from you. Not ever, understand me?” He nodded into my shoulder, and I gave him a kiss on the forehead.

“I love you so much. Now I need you to take care of your brother and sister for me okay?” 

“Okay mom,” he said, going inside. 

I drove to the office, finding the team in the conference room. 

“How are the kids?” Aaron asked. 

“Asleep, Jack’s getting ready for bed. He’s gonna be alright.” 

The team were looking into the background of all 13 convicts that had escaped. Aaron and I were in his office, going over the Peter Lewis file. 

“I hate him. I despise him. If I ever get my hands on him…”

“Babe, I don’t want you anywhere near him,” Aaron said to me.

“He almost killed you, he drugged you, he hurt you, and he almost got you arrested for conspiracy of terrorism.”

“Exactly why I want you safe and away from him.” He got up and came over to where I sat on the couch. 

“Aaron, this is a really bad time, but I just need you to distract me.”

He gave me a look, curious to what I meant, but I leaned forward and kissed him, grabbing at his belt and undoing it.

“Baby, the whole team is right outside this office,” he said, pushing at my hands.

“Then be quiet,” I countered, pulling his pants and boxers down to his thighs. He quickly grabbed my hands, pushing me to lay back on the couch. He pushed my hands out of the way, getting my jeans undone and pulling them off me completely. He worked two fingers into me quickly, stretching me enough not to hurt me. 

“Get inside me,” I ordered, and he smacked my thigh, but did as I said, towering over me and slipping inside. The brief fingering he gave me wasn’t enough, and I felt myself stretching to accommodate him. 

“Who gives the orders around here?” He asked me, breathing into my ear.

“You do, sir.”

“That’s right.” He thrusted into me, using one of his thumbs on my clit to get me going. “You better cum quickly this time, anyone could walk in here and see you like this.”

I nodded, lost in the pleasure. I needed to feel him close to me, to feel how much love he had for me. He could tell I was close, and kissed me to cover my moan as I came around his cock. He grabbed my legs, lifting them up to deepen the angle as he pounded into me, chasing his own release. 

“I love you, Aaron.”

“I love you,” he said, kissing my neck as he bottomed out and came inside me. 

We spent the next five months chasing down the escaped criminals. Spencer took some time to go to Paris with his mom, and apparently she had a fantastic time. We borrowed an Agent from the Fugitive Task Force to assist us, Luke Alvez, as he had experience capturing The Crimson King the first time around, and he was one of our escapees. 

It soon became clear to us that Peter Lewis was behind the latest incidents. He drugged a DID patient into thinking he was The Crimson King. He cut the word Hotch into a girl’s forehead. He even wiped the memory of the real Crimson King. We were still hunting Lewis, but he was also hunting us. Other cases came up, including a serial arsonist who burned his young victims alive. JJ had a rough time with that one, and Aaron made her take time off. 

Jack had a soccer game one Saturday, and we didn’t have a case, so the whole family went out to cheer him on. I had my hands full trying to keep Noah and Avery from running off, or onto the field. As I was chasing Avery for the tenth time, I saw him out of the corner of my eye. I wasn’t sure at first, til he raised his hand and waved at me. I immediately grabbed Avery, rushing over to Aaron and Noah.

“Aaron, he’s here.” The panic in my voice alerted him, and he looked to where I subtly pointed. Lewis was gone by then, he had only wanted to taunt us, let us know he knew where we were. Aaron immediately called the team, and the local police, but no one was able to catch Lewis. 

We had protection detail outside the house that night, and I put Noah and Avery to bed early. Jack was still up, and he knew something was wrong. 

“What’s going on?” he asked us once the twins were asleep.

“There’s a bad man that we’re looking for, I saw him today at the soccer field,” I explained.

“Does he wanna hurt us?”

“He wants to hurt me,” Aaron said. 

“Jack, we won’t let him anywhere near you, or your siblings,” I said, hugging him and kissing his head. “Why don’t you sleep in the twins room with them tonight? Keep them safe.” Jack nodded and went to grab his sleeping bag and blankets. We had an officer outside the twin’s bedroom window. 

“Aaron, if he knew where to find us, we have to assume he knows where we live. Where Jack goes to school, the twins daycare.”

“I know,” he grabbed my hand and pulled me toward him, hugging me to him. 

“Until he’s caught, the kids aren’t safe. You aren’t safe.”

“What do you want us to do, Y/N?”

“Go into Witness Protection. Until Lewis is caught.”

“Who’s gonna lead the team?”

“I dunno, we can find someone. Aaron, I don’t want another Foyet on our hands. I don’t want my kids afraid for their lives.”

“I know, sweetheart. We’ll figure it out,” he kissed me deeply, and I could feel him trying to take away my fear. 

We spoke with The Director, and with the Marshall service. We even called Emily Prentiss and asked her to come fill in temporarily. We told them Aaron was being tapped for a special assignment, classified of course. We thought we could come back. Then Lewis was spotted at Jack’s school. It became clear that the kids were in danger, so we decided it be best if we went into Witness Protection fully. With that came our decision to resign, both of us. Aaron’s final request was for Emily to take over as Unit Chief, and I agreed. But I couldn’t leave without saying goodbye, I just couldn’t. Aaron took the kids and I stayed behind.

I was sitting in Aaron’s old office, waiting for the team to come back from a missing kid case. I saw them come in through the window, and waited for Emily to come up. She saw me through the window and rushed inside.

“Y/N! What are you doing here?” She whisper-yelled. I stood up and hugged her.

“I couldn’t leave without saying goodbye.”

“Isn’t this dangerous? Where are Hotch and the kids?”

“They’re gone, they’ll be safe. I have to take like 5 different flights around the whole country before I can join them, just to make sure Lewis doesn’t track me.”

“I can’t believe you guys are gone…I just got back, I thought we’d have more time together,” she said sadly.

“I know. I wish we did. And this goes against so many protocols, but I need you to call me if I need to come back. If something major is happening, you call me.” I handed her a piece of paper with my new cellphone number on it. 

She immediately typed it into her phone, labeling me as a random name. I took the paper back, to dispose of somewhere else. 

“Are you gonna say goodbye to the team?” She asked, and I nodded. 

She led me out of the office, and JJ was the first to see me.

“Y/N!” I rushed down the stairs to hug her, followed by Garcia, then Luke, and finally Rossi. 

“bella, what are you doing here?” Rossi asked me.

“Saying goodbye. And asking that if you guys get the chance, catch Peter Lewis and kick his ass for me. For us.”

“We’ll find him,” Luke promised. 

I chatted with the team for a few more minutes, but I really needed to catch my flight, and I was missing the one person I wanted to see the most. I found him in the conference room, hiding.

“Spence,” I called to him, and he turned around slowly. I could see he was crying. I went over and hugged him tightly. “I love you so much, Spencer Reid. And when you find Peter Lewis and get him behind bars, we are all coming for a visit.”

“I can’t believe you’re leaving. I just lost Derek.”

“I know, I know I’m so sorry. This was the best decision for our family.”

“I know…”

“Noah and Avery are gonna know all about their godfather. and Jack will keep practicing his magic so that when you see him next, he’ll be even better than you.”

“I don’t want you to go…”

“Only for a little while, baby boy.” I kissed his cheek, and said my final goodbye. Stepping into the elevator, the team came out and waved me off. I waited for the doors to close before I started to cry.

2 days of flying all over the country, I finally landed in Seattle. Aaron and the kids were waiting for me to pick me up. I hugged Noah and Avery, then Jack, before finally hugging my husband and kissing him. 

“We missed you,” he said to me softly.

“I missed you.”

Aaron drove us to our new home, and the kids immediately went off to do their own thing. Aaron gave me the tour, before we ended up in our bedroom. 

“How did the team take it?” he asked me, sitting next to me on the bed. I was wiggling my butt, trying to get used to the feeling of the mattress. I knew it was in my head, but it felt like pins and needles. I missed our normal mattress.

“They understand we’re protecting our family. Spence is devastated.”

“I’m sorry you had to leave him like that.”

“I told Emily to call us if it was important enough.” Aaron nodded, placing one hand on my thigh to stop it moving, and the other on my cheek, turning me to look at him. He kissed me gently, and I sighed into it. 

“Someone will be dead before Emily does that, maybe not even then…” he joked, and I smiled slightly. 

“I hate being out of the loop. It’s gonna be weird…being normal parents…”

“It’s gonna be fun trying to keep the twins from revealing our secret identities.”

“Just give them the patented Hotch stare, they’ll behave.”

“Oh, this one?” He gave me that look that instantly made me want to do whatever he said. 

“Yup…that one…”

“Tonight, you and I are gonna christen this bedroom…and when the kids are at school, we’re gonna christen the whole house.”

“Is that a promise, sir?”

Aaron tackled me to the bed, kissing me deeply as I laughed.


End file.
